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Mistress Manners: Gay Pride |
Posted by
callei on Saturday, July 03, 2004 - 05:01 AM PST
As gay pride week approaches, I look back with a sense of nostalgia on all the parades I have been in. I think back on the math that the organizers told us about, that each one of us represented 10 people that couldn’t be there. I wonder about those 10 people and what they are doing now. I wonder what kept them from being able to march with me, side by side for the rights of people to pursue happiness, or at least get laid by the person of their choice.
I also think back on the history of Gay Pride Week: the Stonewall riots, the White Night riot, the phrase “gay village”, AIDS, the enactment of the “hate crimes” bill, the equal rights amendment, “gay” marriage, “Ellen”, rainbow flags, Dykes on Bikes, “gay until graduation, and “I kiss girls” t-shirts. I also remember the friends I have lost to AIDS, hate crimes, police brutality, and murder.
I remember the organizers talking to us kids about why we needed people to show up and march. I remember the speeches and the parties. I also remember the over the top outfits, the men kissing in the street, and all the kids that got lollypops instead of condoms from the condom fairies.
The Stonewall riots were the starting point of the politically active gay rights movement. It splintered immediately into hundreds of factions, partially because there was so much to do, and partially because they could. The White Night riot happened when the man that shot Harvey Milk (openly gay politician) got off with manslaughter instead of getting the chair. Gay villages (one in S.F. and one in N.Y.) became Mecca’s for the young, horney and queer, and strangely, the rents went up as fast as the clothes came off.
I was there when AIDS (called KSOI, GRID, and other series’ of letters meaning about the same thing, “its kills gay men”) hit. I lost a close friend of the family, a man that had babysat me when I was 8. That death was followed by many more, some close friends some total strangers, but I remember the fear, the hysteria, and the sense that something had to be done. I remember the black armbands.
The equal rights amendment, the one that means that husband beating is just as serious as wife beating and that a girl wasn’t asking to be raped just because she wore a dress still hasn’t been ratified. The hate crimes bill is still pending and being fought because it would mean that being mean WHILE beating the hell out of someone was actually worse than just beating someone.
Gay marriage laws are moving forward and people are getting to have the right to share their money with their lover. And this is a great reason to celebrate. “Ellen”, a sit-com about an openly gay woman, ran for a year, another good reason to celebrate. Dykes on Bikes, who have changed their name to include all women that want to ride in the SF Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual and Transgender Parade, have great breasts. Yet one more reason to party. And do I really need to explain why “gay until graduation” and “I kiss girls” t-shirts are reasons to celebrate? I sure hope not.
So what is Gay Pride all about? It’s about sex and death and disco. It’s about community building and networking. It’s about votes. It’s about marketing and freebies. It’s about remembering the people that have died in protest to make it ok to wear an “I kiss girls” t-shirt to the parade. It’s about fashion and fanatics. It’s about real people being people as hard and as loud as they can.
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Gay Pride | Login/Create an account | 20 Comments |
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Re: Gay Pride
by Domkitten (saradevil@saradevil.com)
on Jul 03, 2004 - 11:18 AM
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In a lot of ways Gay Pride is about growing up. As the years pass, as Stonewall becomes a distant memory celbrated with a potluck dinner between aging police and the aging citizens they were bashing, the Gay Movement has grown up.
It needed to, if it was going to be taken seriously. In the hundred or so years before Stonewall, the secretly gay were also coifed, thoughtful, outspoken, and living on a dangerous edge of exposure. Frequently managing to be in the background. But as all things chane, and the gay society became a realy culture group it went through it's inevitable teenage years of rebellion, outrageousness, and outright silliness. And it had too, in order to become a living, breathing entity that could change rights in different ways, the gay movement needed to be truly out and in your face.
And now, we can have Gay Pride, rainbow stickers, pink triangles, topless biker chicks, rollerbladding drag nuns, kings and queens in all ages, shapes, sizes, colors, and creeds, come together and still be taken seriously.
Queer culture had to explode, and then reshape itself, and learn to find a niche both in and outside of society, becoming better and more recoginzed (Queer Eye, L-Word, Ellen, Oprah, Martina, Poppie, etc. etc.) more notorious (Dan Savage, Nick Sedaris, Log Cabin Republican Party ), and more acceptable (Too Wong Foo is the best example of this to date, but Priscilla is the better movie, Civil Unions, Adoption, and apple pie).
And the realer people get, the easier it will be to change the world.
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Re: Gay Pride by callei on Jul 03, 2004 - 11:53 AM (User info | Send a Message) http://http:// | I cant agree more. And that as more people come out and live openly, there are more voices to be heard, more "issues" that arise (marriage, adoption, dont ask dont tell) that come out too. When the movement was just made up of those that were willing to risk thier lives everyday, it was a smaller movement. Now that they have pushed open that door, and found so many friends on the other side, more people can and do live more openly with less fear of being beaten to death on the subway.
And just like remembering our childhood helps us understand who we are as adults, remebering the terribles teens of the sexual freedom movement helps us understand where it is today.
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Re: Gay Pride by callei on Jul 05, 2004 - 09:33 AM (User info | Send a Message) http://http:// | you are one of the "strightest" (hehehehe) people i have ever met, but ya know what? that is your kink and i respect that. I dont care what someone likes to do in bed, unless they are trying to get me into bed or I am trying to get them into bed.
Then ofcourse I care ALOT. |
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Re: Gay Pride
by MystryssRavynDarque (MystryssRavynHI@wmconnect.com)
on Jul 04, 2004 - 09:56 AM
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I recently attended Seattle Pride Fest and this was my first time ever being around so many many people who are open about their choice in homosexuality, bisexuality, or being transgendered. I am not from a town where this is accepted openly. There are too many churches telling people it is wrong, there are too many people having to hide their sexuality. Even if they are known as gay they aren't totally open about it. I knew 4 gay boys and a few lesbians, and I knew there were more than that. Why did I have to hide when I wanted to kiss my girlfriend, why did I have to hide that I liked her and wanted to be with her? I hid it from my parents for so long, and they finally found out and I was glad they did, but I was scared of what they would do. They said they loved me no matter what, though my stepmother still thinks it is a phase. I've been on a date with a girl now, but only one date. We didn't even kiss in public that nite. She still has to hide. I respect her for allowing herself to finally accept who she is and what she likes. Her mother kicked her brother out when he was 17 for being gay, and she is only 17 now and she is afraid she will do the same. I am willing to take her in if that ever happens, and she is going to come visit Devin and I for Christmas. She can be as open as she wants to then. Even though there are so many open people in this world, and the world knows about alternative lifestyle choices, it is still not fully accepted. I hope some day it will be, but I do not see it on the horizon yet.
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Re: Gay Pride by MystryssRavynDarque (amanda-at-vibechild-dot-com) on Sep 08, 2005 - 01:05 AM (User info | Send a Message) http://kauai.vibechild.com/~amanda/ | Oh, and the Ellen sitcom ran for 4 years, but it wasn't until the final season that Ellen came out as a gay woman. She began dating and before some of the episodes where she would actually kiss her girlfriend there were "Viewer Discretion" warnings due to "questionable content" at the time. The show began to address the gay rights movement more, even the question of gay marriage. Her girlfriend didn't want to marry Ellen because she said she didn't want to do something that would just be a tease because it wasn't real.
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Re: Gay Pride
by gothicmorman (litty_klj@hotmail.com)
on Jul 04, 2004 - 08:48 PM
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it's all about exposure. make a comparison. one thing i have heard from women that i have talked to is that they don't like the idea of gay people playing with their children because they see them all as molesters. but in essence a lesbian playing with a little girl or a gay playing with a little boy is the same as a straight woman playing with a little boy or a straight man playing with a little girl. would not a child molester be more likely to be, or say that they are, straight so as to gain trust from unsuspecting parents that naturally connect straight with good? put a comparison like that on tv or in the news, it might shock a few people...
the ruthless
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Re: Gay Pride by feralucce (feralucce@wayoutonthecorner.com) on Jul 05, 2004 - 04:50 AM (User info | Send a Message) http://www.wayoutonthecorner.com/feralucce | actually... studies show that LGBT (lesbian, gay, bisexual and trtansgendered) individuals are MUCH less likely to be child molesters or pedaphiles than straights... 99% of offenders aaof this type are straight white blue color fucktards... |
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Re: Gay Pride by callei on Jul 05, 2004 - 08:30 AM (User info | Send a Message) http://http:// | doesnt it suck that we have to keep saying that pedophilia has little or nothing to do with homosexuality? That this kid still thinks that you have to PROVE that they arent inter-related things just makes me want to scream and find exploding tip ammo. |
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Re: Gay Pride by callei on Jul 05, 2004 - 09:31 AM (User info | Send a Message) http://http:// | If we outlaw religion, then only clergy would be outlaws.... wait that isnt as catchy as that one about guns, is it.
we could go scorched earth about here in the US and just kill everyone that cant show proof that they dont want to abuse kids. I mean it would be expensive at least in the year we did it, but it would save sooo much money in proson construction, monitoring programs, medicare costs, and social awareness TV shows, that i think it would cost out in like 3 years at the outside.
Some days i love being an extremist. |
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Re: Gay Pride by Domkitten (saradevil@saradevil.com) on Jul 05, 2004 - 09:36 AM (User info | Send a Message) http://www.saradevil.com | stop child molesters, blow up an old folks home.
Hmm...still not quite as catchy.
If it looks straigh, walks, straight, and hangs out at the kiddie pool, get it....
I don't know, there's gotta be a tag line in here somewhere.
However elminiating the problem with pedophila will be a time consuming ardeous task because no one really wants to be belive that Uncle John is touching Bobby when they go on camping trips, especially since Bobby just loves his Uncle John so much.
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Re: Gay Pride by callei on Jul 05, 2004 - 09:51 AM (User info | Send a Message) http://http:// | maybe we can just kill all the men that we (the female collective) cant prove innocent?
Soilent Green is Child Molesters!
Save a Child, Kill a Neighbor!
Protect the future, Kill the past? |
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Re: Slogenering by callei on Jul 05, 2004 - 09:58 AM (User info | Send a Message) http://http:// | I know that some radical xian groups have used it before, but ya know, it would work for Geee-Dub as well, since his beliefs (insanity) say that GAWD is coming to kill all the good people as soon as all the bad people are dead. So he can get smited by his god as soon as he kills everyone else, distroys all that has been, and makes this the hell his GAWD has promised him (and yes i do think that since he started taking the good drugs, he does beleive that his GAWD does talk to him). |
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Re: Gay Pride by Domkitten (saradevil@saradevil.com) on Jul 05, 2004 - 09:26 AM (User info | Send a Message) http://www.saradevil.com | Interestingly enough the argument you are making only continues to perpetuate a completely erroneous and false statements that straight people who are a little afraid of homosexuals, but want to come off as gay friendly, make as a way of showing how understanding they are of the problems of the queer world.
It may come as a shock to you, and completely irradiated your basis for being gay friendly, but being confused with child molesters is the least of our problems. Generally the only people would hear the words “I’m gay” and then think “Child molester “ are red necks who live in the various backwaters of America and who only hear the words “I’m gay” via popular media or TV program, and who, could, in truth, care less about “homos” because the gay community is not a part of their day to day life anyway.
Unfortunately the myth continues to be perpetuated because of dumb fuck “I’m not gay but I understand you” people who will go on add nauseam about how horrible it is they queers are confused with child molesters.
For some reason this segment of the straight population that really really really wants to be gay friendly can never seem to think of anything else that gives them a glimpse or understanding, or window of empathy into gay life. And it’s easy to understand that because these same oh-so-straight people have never tired to understand how it might feel to be excluded from anything based on who you love or are attracted to.
These homo-friendly breeders, alas, can simply not fathom not having the right to marry, not having the right to adopt children, not becoming the parent of a child that your wife had because you’re the same sex, not being able to claim your partner on your health insurance, not being able to hold hands in public in certain parts of town, not being able to wear a dress or skirt when you feel like it without someone calling you a faggot, being fired from you job because someone found out you kissed a person of your gender, not being able to express yourself without someone telling “if you don’t want trouble than don’t announce your sexuality” in the same breath that they will talk about getting advice from their husband or wife. No, these “I have a friend who is gay” straights will simply think “oh, how awful it must be for you when people tell you you’re a child molester.”
Yes, yes, thanks you so much gothicmoron, for being so understanding the plights of the queer community.
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Re: Gay Pride by feralucce (feralucce@wayoutonthecorner.com) on Jul 05, 2004 - 09:34 AM (User info | Send a Message) http://www.wayoutonthecorner.com/feralucce | I agree with all that oyu have said... and it is because so few are actually exposed in a meaningful way... human minds make us see an us and them quality... and if they are them, not us, then there is no way that can be like us... |
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Re: Gay Pride by callei on Jul 05, 2004 - 09:45 AM (User info | Send a Message) http://http:// | I think he name gives away that fact that he doesnt have a very wide world view. I personally hadnt heard this bit of hate mongering for well over 3 years. I was sort of shocked to see someone post this crap on an article writen for those that know what its like to only have one day a year, and only in a few cities, where they can be "free" to be themselves knowing that most of people around them are part of thier dating pool.
Im saying that badly. what i mean is that the fests/parades/marches are one day when you, as a woman, know that the woman standing next to you is not going to call the cops on your for telling her she has a nice ass. This is a "freedom" that heterosexuals take for granted. and I dont know if a hetero can really understand what it is like to be treated the way a homosexual gets treated UNLESS they spend time at a drunken queer event where they get hit on, chatted up and treated like the possible sex partner of a sex they REALLY dont want to fuck.
Anyways... thank you for the soft sarcasm here. Let me say it more strongly, in case this person doesnt get it yet.
Fuck you and your mis-guided attempts to pretend you understand MY life. wash out your brain and let this idea go and next time some idiot spouts this crap at your, just stare at them and laugh at how fucking stupid they are. DO NOT try to justify it, dont try to change thier mind, dont cite facts, just laugh in thier face. like we are doing to you. |
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Re: Gay Pride by gothicmorman (litty_klj@hotmail.com) on Sep 08, 2005 - 06:25 AM (User info | Send a Message) http://www.freewebs.com/gothicmorman | [quote]put a comparison like that on tv [/quote]
[b]like[/b] that, thus with much clearer content.
[quote]actually... studies show that LGBT (lesbian, gay, bisexual and trtansgendered) individuals are MUCH less likely to be child molesters or pedaphiles than straights... 99% of offenders aaof this type are straight white blue color fucktards...[/quote]
[quote]doesnt it suck that we have to keep saying that pedophilia has little or nothing to do with homosexuality? That this kid still thinks that you have to PROVE that they arent inter-related things just makes me want to scream and find exploding tip ammo. [/quote]
that is fact which is little to nothing when compared to opinion.
[quote]Interestingly enough the argument you are making only continues to perpetuate a completely erroneous and false statements that straight people who are a little afraid of homosexuals, but want to come off as gay friendly, make as a way of showing how understanding they are of the problems of the queer world. [/quote]
I am bisexual, not "gay friendly", it doesn't prove anything but the fact that i live in a redneck town that does happen to have a gay population, and a town in which the word "pedophile" is commenly used in direct comparison with "faggot" and then they trash your stuff and ride off in their parentally bought BMW. not the end of the world but it kind of puts a damper on a good day.
It is not that way everywhere and maybe most of the world is not like that but there are parts that are, there are people that think that way so you can't ignore it completely and hope that it will dissapear.
Fuck YOU and your own mis-guided attempts to pretend that i said or even thought anything about understanding your life. I don't know you, I have never pretended we were friends. I cannot comprehend how any of you can dump so much "inner meaning" on what i said or make up that im "understanding the plights of the queer community." It was input to the subject at hand - that is all. The subject was yours and the input was mine and they were not interrelated as my life is not applicable to yours given that we are different people living in different places and we are not even terribley close in age. but that is fact which is nothing against the opinion that i was "hate mongering" and that i totally applied everything i said to you as i was typing it or that i even expected anyone at all to be like "yah, that is totally what it like for me ALL the time."
[quote]wash out your brain and let this idea go and next time some idiot spouts this crap at your, just stare at them and laugh at how fucking stupid they are. DO NOT try to justify it, dont try to change thier mind, dont cite facts, just laugh in thier face. like we are doing to you. [/quote]
thank you for this advice, it is what i do in places like school when any idiot spouts any crap at me but most of the "it is wrong to be homosexual" crap i get comes from my dear christian mother, so if you have any advice for getting along with parents it would be much appreiciated.
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