Home Sweet Home
Date Thursday, March 28, 2024 - 07:34 AM PST
Topic Icky People


"She hasn't left you yet but she will
by airplane ticket or kill-me pills.
Sewn into her dress, she can't refuse
(careful what you love, what you abuse).
She knows violence, she knows please
her hands for cuffing and she says nothing
and hooks her hands behind her knees."
I was a volunteer domestic abuse advocate for nearly 5 years. I worked with women in countless situations. Elderly women who'd been abused for 40+ years, young women in college or even high school, mothers abused by their teen children.

When I was in training we learned that a really common way an abuser intimidates the abused is by abusing/torturing/killing the family pet. I figured this was just a bizarre example of intimidation behavior. It's not. The number of cases I dealt with were astounding. I finally began asking the women if such things were happening in their home. Many women ignored the usual red flags, but I was able to help them understand the link between the murder of an animal and the potential murder of a person.

Abuse in the home is like dirty laundry that no one wants to air.

Someone in an abusive situation feels like they are alone, or that they are "bad" and one of "those kinds of people." We treat domestic violence like a social problem. Ignore it and it will go away…like homelessness and drug addiction.

Why does she stay? Why does he hurt her?

I'm not here to argue these points.

HOME is supposed to be the fuzzy soft place that keeps us safe--our own little world. I feel grateful every day.

"Twist her arm til she's cries uncle
crawling through your bedroom jungle
turn off the light, time to succeed
she's China glass, there to bleed.
Her lovely throat, her lovely cough,
white eyes are smoking, black sea is broken,
she's already destroyed, just finish her off"

Quotes: Nicole Blackman


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