Artificial Vanilla Flavor Added Date Friday, April 19, 2024 - 04:50 PM PST Topic Smut You can pour as much artificial vanilla flavor on it as you want to, social interactions are all about Dominance and submission. Every time that two or more human beings interact, someone takes the lead and someone is led. The roles shift back and forth under normal circumstances, but there is always a necessary amount of domination and submission going on. If it were not so, nothing would ever get done. Either nobody would be able to get a word in, or people would stare at one another waiting for someone else to initiate a simple coversation. This is the normal dynamic of being a social animal. It should come as a surprise then that so many people have issues about these necessary and natural interactions in their most intimate moments together. Almost nobody needs to read a book or become educated in D/s etiquette when they learn to speak with one another, but when their clothes come off they suddenly feel under-equipped to deal with the same issues that they never even think about any other time. A lot of this stems from the fact that everyday D/s is understood perfectly well as the way things have to work. There is a tacit understanding that we can't all speak at once, that whomever is speaking has the floor, that this or that anecdote is "mine" and anything that can be added to it is done so with my approval and consent. Even when we disagree, we do so with the understanding that there will be a "winner" and a "loser", and that those roles are going to switch back and forth in the future the way they always have in the past. So the question becomes: what changes when you add a sexual context to topping and bottoming? Why are we suddenly concerned about how our interactions affect our "identities" when this happens? The answer might have to do with some very irrational attitudes we maintain regarding the terms we are using. In public, we are often told to "master our emotions" (I have always preferred to mistress mine). By "mastering", we do not mean that we discipline or train ourselves. What is generally understood by everyone, is that to master one's emotions, one has to deny having any at all. You do not display your emotions, because you have in theory stopped experiencing them. If a person is caught having any kind of public emotional display, they are regarded as "weak". In this way, we have come to view Dominants as unfeeling but strong, and submissives as needy and weak. This is nonsense. An emotional cripple is poorly equipped to Dom(me) anyone, and some of the strongest and most noble people I know are lifestyle submissives. The problem is that it is one thing to acknowledge these misperceptions when we are fully dressed and Masters and Mistresses of our emotions, and as long as we are speaking hypothetically and about a third party, but it is quite another to confront our own natural and necessary natures when we are on our knees or administering the stern kisses of discipline to another. We do not become different people in our sexual lives than we are in our social lives; it is merely that our perceptions of ourselves are that much more explicit in the former case. If you use the terms "Dominant" or "submissive" pejoratively in a social setting, it is clear that you do not yet grasp what it means to be a social animal. In practice, we are all switches regardless of how we prefer to identify ourselves. It does not diminish us in any way to acknowledge our submissive sides any more than it empowers us to face the fact that we are often called upon to Dominate. It is simply the way we are. This article comes from Shmeng http://www.shmeng.com/ The URL for this story is: http://www.shmeng.com/modules.php?op=modload&name=News&file=article&sid=668