Subject: They say it only takes 8 pounds of force.
KittyGoesMrow
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Posts: 218 Registered: 30/4/2003 Status: Offline
posted on 14/1/2005 at 08:56 PM
I wasnt sure if this was considered a goth joke or not.... but I was sure
as hell laughing.
Woman Tore off Ex-Lover's Testicle, Court Told
By Will Batchelor, PA
A jilted woman today admitted ripping off her ex-lover’s testicle with her
bare hands after he refused to have sex with her.
Amanda Monti, 24, flew into a rage after her ex-boyfriend, 37-year-old
Geoffrey Jones, rejected her advances at the end of a drunken house
party.
She yanked off his left testicle, which was later handed to him by a friend
with the words: “That’s yours.”
Monti, of Birkenhead, Merseyside, pleaded guilty to wounding at Liverpool
Crown Court today and will be sentenced next month.
The court heard that Mr Jones had ended his long-term relationship with
Monti towards the end of May last year.
The pair remained on good terms and on May 30, Monti offered to collect Mr
Jones from a barbecue and drive him to his home in Netherton, Merseyside.
She then drove him to another party and then home again, where friends
joined them for more drinks.
As the drinks party was winding down, Monti told Mr Jones she wanted to
discuss their relationship and offered him sex.
When he refused, she grabbed his face and a struggle ensued.
Mr Jones threw petite Monti, who is little more than 5ft 2ins tall, out of
the house. She then smashed a window and confronted him on the doorstep as
he went to investigate.
Another struggle took place and Monti was knocked to the floor, from where
she pulled down Mr Jones’ shorts.
In a statement read out by judge Charles James, Mr Jones continued: “I was
left standing in my underpants. She was still lying on the floor.
“Suddenly she grabbed my genitals and pulled hard. That caused my
underpants to come off and I found I was completely naked and in
excruciating pain.”
Referring to his friend Danny McDonagh, who was sleeping at the house after
the party, Mr Jones said: “I believe Danny walked out shortly afterwards.
He came into the kitchen and said to me, ’That’s yours’, and I saw that he
was holding one of my testicles in his hand.”
Monti initially tried to hide the testicle by putting it in her mouth, but
released it. Doctors were unable to re-attach the organ.
Defence barrister Wendy Lloyd said her client did not remember much of the
incident. However, she accepted the prosecution’s version of events and did
not claim to have acted in self-defence.
Monti, who spoke only to confirm her name and enter a guilty plea, was
released on conditional bail for sentence on February 10.
____________________ Anata ga sabishii toki, bokumo sabishii n da yo
W0rmW00d
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Posts: 355 Registered: 5/8/2004 Status: Offline
posted on 15/1/2005 at 08:06 AM
Ow. Theres plenty of stories like that though, so it may not be a joke,
like the guy getting out of the bath only to slip and fall legs astride
what had become a porcelain torture instrument and burst his testicles. Or
the guy whose name i think was Cox who cut off his penis and threw it into
the fire so that he would have less distractions from worshipping his
god.
Where did you come by the information that it only takes 8lb of force? How
does one actually study that. I cannot imagine there would be many willing
participants for such a study. Imagine the scene:
Doctor: OK, six pounds of force didnt do it, we are going to try six point
one.
Assistant: Alright, six point one, testicle remover power going on in
three, two, one...
Willing participant: AAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHH
Doctor: Shit, six point one didn't work, lets try six point one one....
____________________ Eritis sicut Deus scientes bonum et malum.
And the third angel sounded, and a troll army did descend upon the world.
KittyGoesMrow
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Posts: 218 Registered: 30/4/2003 Status: Offline
posted on 15/1/2005 at 12:45 PM
LOL!!!! I did wonder that myself.
____________________ Anata ga sabishii toki, bokumo sabishii n da yo
W0rmW00d
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Posts: 355 Registered: 5/8/2004 Status: Offline
posted on 16/1/2005 at 05:05 PM
This sort of fact does scare me. I have been told by my housemate that
someone did actually do proper research into car accidents. Inspired by the
strange statistics you get like 'being hit by a car doing 40 is equivalent
to being hit by a charging rhino' it has been discovered that a box of
tissues from the rear shelf of a car hitting you on the back of the head in
a 40mph head on collision is the equivalent to having a doormouse hit you
or something.
I am told that actual research was done.....
Worrying.
____________________ Eritis sicut Deus scientes bonum et malum.
And the third angel sounded, and a troll army did descend upon the world.
KittyGoesMrow
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Posts: 218 Registered: 30/4/2003 Status: Offline
posted on 17/1/2005 at 10:31 PM
-sneeks up behind and tugs- NOPE! NOT 7.5! -runs-
____________________ Anata ga sabishii toki, bokumo sabishii n da yo
Rogue
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Posts: 199 Registered: 31/12/1969 Status: Offline
posted on 17/1/2005 at 10:57 PM
I'd give my left nut to see how they do research like that.
____________________ Plenty of time, my sweet. Plenty of time.
KittyGoesMrow
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Posts: 218 Registered: 30/4/2003 Status: Offline
posted on 17/1/2005 at 11:00 PM
Seriously I'm sure they study the strength of the.. err.. testicles and see
the type of stuff that hold them together n such and then make models of
stuff with the same strength and test.
____________________ Anata ga sabishii toki, bokumo sabishii n da yo
W0rmW00d
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Posts: 355 Registered: 5/8/2004 Status: Offline
posted on 18/1/2005 at 11:47 AM
Or, clever suggestion from my bandmate lastnight: Perhaps they use dead
people?
____________________ Eritis sicut Deus scientes bonum et malum.
And the third angel sounded, and a troll army did descend upon the world.
KittyGoesMrow
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Posts: 218 Registered: 30/4/2003 Status: Offline
posted on 18/1/2005 at 08:25 PM
After the body is dead the skin doesn't have the same elasticity i don't
think.
____________________ Anata ga sabishii toki, bokumo sabishii n da yo
W0rmW00d
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Posts: 355 Registered: 5/8/2004 Status: Offline
posted on 18/1/2005 at 10:12 PM
No, I imagine that the tissue breakdown could well be rather rapid, but on
a freshly deceased body I doubt that the epidermal decay could have
advanced to the stage whereby a study on it could be sufficiently
compromised given the wide range of human physiology across the species.
Oooh, look at all those pretty words. I don't imagine that I ever expected
to use the term 'epidermal decay' within any sort of appropriate context.
____________________ Eritis sicut Deus scientes bonum et malum.
And the third angel sounded, and a troll army did descend upon the world.
pigs are also used, as they are very similar in construction to humans
____________________ The earth turns on a tilted axis - just doing the best it can.
Hohenheim of Light~Full Metal Alchemist
W0rmW00d
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Posts: 355 Registered: 5/8/2004 Status: Offline
posted on 19/1/2005 at 10:51 AM
Spent much time pulling testicles from pigs feral?
It still seems pretty nasty to be doing these tests on pigs. Im not a
vegetarian and I don't agree with much of vegetarian logic, however I am
still against excessive cruelty and this seems to fall in there with paté
foie gras.
____________________ Eritis sicut Deus scientes bonum et malum.
And the third angel sounded, and a troll army did descend upon the world.