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Author: Subject: Obligatory End Of Year Post

Extreme Fanatic





Posts: 897
Registered: 31/12/1969
Status: Offline

  posted on 30/12/2011 at 11:40 AM
I've been doing what people do this time of year, doing that whole looking back while simultaneously looking forward thing. And I was wondering if anyone else was doing the same. Specifically if anyone here (if there is anyone here) was doing the same. And if so, what you are thinking. What were the big, eventful things that happened to you last year? What did you accomplish that you set out to do? And what do you have planned for 2012, besides not experiencing the end of the world?

Personally, I had a great year. Started out with a bang in February by visiting Arthegarn in Spain, which was amazing in every detail (except the actual travel.) I joined a roller derby team in 2010, and this year both the team and I had our first bouting season, and we even won a bout. I wasn't the best skater out there, but I held my own, and I'm very proud of myself. I also had my first paid fire performance. It went well, my clients were pleased, and I had to pinch myself, because it must be a dream if I was being paid to do something I usually beg for the chance to do.

It wasn't the easiest of years in all ways. I had some minor, but annoying health problems, and all the stress that surrounds something like that. I'm still stuck in factory work, still doing the single mom thing, and ended up breaking up with my boyfriend of a couple of years, mainly because we didn't have time to keep up with the relationship. We're still friends, but it's still kind of sad.

But the kindergothen is doing extremely well. Making good grades, finding cool friends, being a very popular mascot for our roller derby team, and generally being a little sweetheart of a tomboy who makes life very rewarding for me. She's nine now, can you believe it?

And what do I want for the year to come? I want another roller derby season, maybe get more than one win this year. I want more fire performances, and to improve my fire eating skills particularly. I want to take a trip to Mexico with the Kindergothen to visit one of my favorite cousins. I want to do some serious work towards going to college. If I don't at least scope out my options this year, I'm going to be very mad at myself. And I've decided that I want to climb the highest mountain in my state - again. I did it when I was eight, and I want to see if I can do it again. I think I can. And I want to continue the good work I've done with myself for the last few years, in discovering what I really want from this life, and pursuing it relentlessly. If I don't have a happy 2012, I have no one to blame but myself.

So, the rest of you, if you're lurking about, what have you been up to, and what do you want? Do tell!

 

____________________
"You can tell by the scars on my arms and the cracks in my hips and the dents in my car and the blisters on my lips that I'm not the carefullest of girls." - Dresden Dolls, "Girl Anachronism"

 

Extreme Fanatic




Posts: 648
Registered: 24/9/2002
Status: Offline

  posted on 30/12/2011 at 03:31 PM
It sounds like you've had a great year Schizo. I'm very glad to hear(read) that you're doing so well in your life and that you're getting to do the things you love. Currently I can only daydream of traveling across the other great expanse of water, but someday it will happen.

This year started out not so great as Devin and I broke up with our partner. We'd been with her for about a year and a half, and it just didn't work out in the end. There are too many details I don't want to dredge up about it, but I know that we're both better off without that stress in our lives anymore.

I continued on with my B.A. program and finished out my first year in May. Over the summer my dad and step-mom came to visit. It was so nice to see them again, and to see them here. I think we've all grown up a lot and that distance has made the heart grow fonder these past seven years. While I've seen them every couple of years since my move I believe that this was the best connection time. It was on my own turf and they were away from the stresses of their lives.

This past semester my community psychology prof suggested we work toward publishing my term paper in an academic journal next year. I'm nervous, but i readily accepted the idea and I'm looking forward to working on it after the new year. If/when it is published I will share that information. The topic is the psychological barriers of the reduction and mitigation of greenhouse gas emissions and their effects on climate change. While community psychology wasn't my initial focus area it is definitely going to be further integrated into my degree. I'm working toward a well rounded, diversified social science degree. I may someday go for a Masters, but that's not something that will occur in 2012.

Do I think the world is going to explode or implode in 2012? No. If it does then it does. There seems to be no reason for me to think about it. I'll focus on living my life. I'd like to find another female partner this coming year, or to at least have a few really great dates or flings. I'd also like to work toward building up enough endurance to participate in a 5k should I choose to enter one. If we can buy a house in 2012 I'd love to work on many DIY home projects and create a comfortable and happy space for us to live in. And, of course I'd like to continue my education.

Oh, and if anyone speaks French and would like to tutor someone, please let me know. My tutor from last semester flaked out.

Au revoir! Bonne année et bonne santé!

 

____________________
"People always say what we are looking for is a meaning for life…I don't think that's what we're looking for. I think what we're looking for is the experience of being alive." -Joseph Campbell

 

Extreme Fanatic




Posts: 897
Registered: 31/12/1969
Status: Offline

  posted on 31/12/2012 at 12:08 PM
Tis the season to look forward and backward all at once. So here goes. Schizo 2012, and what I want for 2013.

First, did I accomplish my goals for this past year?

Roller derby - I hurt my back earlier this year, and then lost my health insurance (more about that later) so this year has been about finding my niche in my team without actually being on the roster. I tried training to be a ref, I did a lot of work as an NSO (non-skating official) but apparently the team decided that they want me to be their announcer. I filled in once when the guy they hired failed to show up, and they liked my work so much that they've signed me on indefinitely. Yay! So I still get to be involved, even if I'm no longer knocking girls off their skates.

Fire - I didn't end up booking any paid performances this year, but I got some chances to mess around, and got to learn some new fire eating tricks, and experiment with some new toys, like whips, fans, and nunchucks. All in all, it was definitely not a wasted year.

Mexico - I went! The Kindergothen and I had a blast, despite her father filling her mind full of fears of scorpions, plane crashes, earthquakes, and violence. He inadvertently gave me the chance to teach her the concepts of scepticism and research. A pity he ended up the cautionary tale, but at least she knows how to check facts now. We explored the beautiful town of Xalapa, in the shadow of the tallest peak in Mexico (a dormant volcano) and roamed an amazing gorge in the middle of the jungle, with cascades and palm trees and little lizards and tropical flowers. I'm getting hooked on this travel thing!

College/employment - Here's where things got crazy. After almost ten years at this factory job, I finally had a breakdown. Fell into a series of anxiety attacks and couldn't make myself go back. I've been living by the skin of my teeth ever since. But, somehow, this has been a very positive experience. I'm starting to see what is really important to me. I've shed a lot of layers of stress and anxiety over my life. I've been re-discovering parts of myself that I discarded along the way, either at the urging of others, or because I thought I just didn't have time or energy for them. I've done some work studying Spanish on my own. I rediscovered my love for music, and for being out by myself in the woods. I got to briefly work for a local farm, doing chores when the owner was away. I did a lot of cooking from scratch, spent a lot of time with my daughter. This past month, I finally stopped being able to pay for my apartment and I have moved back to the campus of my old Bible School and childhood church. So far I've had no problem with the religiousness of it all, and have just been enjoying the beauty of the place, the slow pace, the community, and the focus on doing real things rather than being in front of a screen all the time. The Kindergothen goes sledding down steep hills with herds of towheaded boys her age rather than sitting inside playing video games. It has been lovely.

It is a temporary arrangement, and I've been thinking long and hard about my next steps. There's possibilities of getting into farm work on a more serious basis, and I'm also weighing the possibility of going to school. One thing is for certain - my factory days are behind me, and I'm going to pay much more attention to my own needs than I ever have before.

Mountain-climbing - I did not get to climb Mt Washington as I hoped (I did not want to go alone, and didn't manage to find a hiking partner) but I have pledged with my uncle to climb it together next year. I did, however, climb a grand total of fifteen local mountains, some of them two or three times. And I achieved my secondary goal of climbing every mountain in the Wapack Range, just a few miles to the east of where I live.

I also managed to take a lot of small trips around, with myself or with my daughter. Several trips to the ocean, one up the coast of Maine with a friend, visiting a place from my childhood and church/family history, and racing Hurricane Sandy back home. Trips to find places I used to visit as a child, and was able to connect one of them to my ancestry, hundreds of years back. Down to Lowell, MA to visit the old cotton mills and canals. It has been a year of fun and freedom, a turning point, a time to take care of myself for a while, and to think about my future.

What do I want for next year? Well, I would love to travel again, but I will likely have no budget for it. I need to figure out the next chapter of my life, whether it involves farming or studying or maybe something completely different. I want to climb Mt. Washington, for reals this time, and hike the Wapack Range all in one go this time (a twenty mile trail.) I want to stay serious about studying Spanish, and continuing to stay involved in music (mostly the piano and singing.) I need to figure out more permanent living arrangements for the Kindergothen and myself. And, more than anything, I need to see that the end of 2013 finds me even more true to myself than 2012 did.

 

____________________
"You can tell by the scars on my arms and the cracks in my hips and the
dents in my car and the blisters on my lips that I'm not the carefullest of
girls." - Dresden Dolls, "Girl Anachronism"

 
 


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