- Cynical Indulgence - (Shmeng is not a Gothic site)Mar 28, 2024 - 08:05 AM  
Welcome to  Shmeng
 Home | Articles | Galleries | Forums | Site Info | Web Links | Reviews | Register 
Articles Section

Eye Candy

Who's Online
Currently no members online:)

You are an anonymous user. You can register for free by clicking here
We have 25 guests online !

   User ID:  Pass:        Forgot Password? click here or  Join here
Illustrations: Collapse
Posted by Squire-of-Gothos on Saturday, May 15, 2004 - 12:22 AM PST

Experiences
I sat in the front seat of the Lincoln, legs crossed, with a cup of coffee in my hand. It was about 11 a.m. and we were parked in the back of the post office. It was me and my mother, dropping off a package, and now I was alone in the car, feeling the breeze blow on my face. The sun was clear and warm that day, and everything seemed fresh and surreal. A woman in a red minivan parked across the lane from me, and waddled out to the building. I felt very free then, as if the light and the coffee, the breeze and car, my bare feet and the cheap look I had that morning, and the waddling woman and red minivan where a soft new dream. It was all very fresh, very clear, and the freedom was mixed with security and comfort. I was so powerful, but so careless, so without worry, that if I could have stayed at the moment forever, in a post office parking lot, I would have. Then two more people parked one after the other and a group of people left the office all at once, and I started to fidget; suddenly my feet triggered my insecurity or my insecurity triggered my feet, I didn’t know. But the moment was lost. I threw my coffee out the window.

One of the women that parked had a plush Micky and Mini Mouse set hanging from her rear view mirror. I began to look closely at it. At first I just thought it was silly, but then I studied it even more:

The corporate motives behind its creation.
The senseless smiles on the unrealistic mouse faces.
The inherent stupidity of a grown woman with dolls hanging from her car mirror.
The inherent stupidity of anyone hanging dolls on their car mirror.
How stupid that fucking women is to hang anything on her mirror.
Those god damned mice meant business.

All of a sudden I saw the mice swinging back and forth, as the women drove down a long dark country road. Then all of a sudden she hits a pothole, and the mice jerk her mirror out of position. As she struggles to eat her plump, dripping, bloated jelly doughnut she is unable to see the head lights behind her. The mirror is broken.

The trucker panics, he swerves, but there is nothing he can do. His tire blow, his pneumatic horn destroyed, and his steering locked, he can only signal with his high beams to the car in front of him. But the car takes no notice and the trucker continues to slide forward, undoubtedly on it’s way to destroying the helpless Volvo and its driver.

The women hear a kind of low rumble, like a far off shotgun blast that keeps on going, and hopes her car is alright. As it grows louder, she decides to pull over. She checks her mirror to see if anyone will mind her deceleration and notices that it is dangling two and frow, assisted by the sinister mice. And as she stick it back onto the windshield, she noticed the quick pulsing beam of a five ton hunk of steel, rocketing at her like a freight train on amphetamines, and it’s then that she wonders: What will I say when it’s all over?

The truck driver, his name is Ed, braces for impact, and just as he’s about to collide with the dinged up brown import wonders: Why in the hell couldn’t that stupid bitch look in her mirror?!

Now that the moment was gone, and this fantasy had been loved, the day was essentially down hill from here.

My mother, we call her Helga, appeared in the rear entrance of the post office, a model of late forties glamour, shrugging her shoulders and shaking her head.

“What, what does this mean.” I yelled through the windows.

“Ten people in front of me.” She rounded the car.

“Fucking scum. Fucking post office scum.” She was in the driver’s seat.

I was making an effort to sound theatrically angry, but the moment was fading fast. I was far too tired to be this sleepy, and it showed: Bags under my eyes, pale skin, and the stench of candy, microwavable hot dogs, cheap coffee and protein being my olfactory tag line for the day. As usual, despite my mother frantically struggling with the inherent mystery of car keys in the ignition, she was able to have a logical response to my boisterous comments.

“And it’s not even the holiday yet.” She had a point. But I had been worried for her.

“I was wondering you know, I was looking for my cell phone to call you and ask you what’s up. See if you got arrested.”

“I know, I remembered you didn’t bring it, I was going to call you.” Then she added something that, in due time, would start another fiasco.

“I had to add the 5 dollars to the label fee.”

“What” Incomprehensible was the word of the day apparently.

“I had to add on the five dollar charge to the 7 dollar postage fee.”

“What five dollar charge?” Now I was getting curious.

“The one they bill you for sending it back” She was getting tense even as she spoke. I raised my voice for effect.

“I don’t know what the fuck you’r talking about, they get that automatically.” But she still had no idea.

“It’s all messed up. Cost me 17 dollars you know.”

”What”

“Total, it cost me 17 dollars so far to send this jacket back and now to get it back.”

“Where do you get 17 dollars from.”

“Ten dollars to ship it out, 7 dollars to send it back, and then another 5 to get it back when it comes. So it’ll end up being….”

It was becoming all so wrong.

“Bullshit, no, no, no. You don’t add the original ten dollars.”

“It was extra.” She was forking the blame over on me again. She was using money as a reason to chew me out, to find reason in my rhyme. This, of course, meant war.

“THAT’S NOT EXTRA! The original ten dollars was part of the original purchase of the jacket, so it is included in the total cost of the jacket because we figured it would be fine. But because it was too large, we ended up spending extra to get it back and forth. The 7 and the 5 is extenuating circumstances that we could not forsee, and a nominal fee at that, so no way do you add the original ten fucking dollars.”

A preemptive strike.

“How long does your father have to work for those extra costs?”

Propaganda.

“Oh give me a fucking break.”

Defensive maneuvering.

“all you do is take, take, take.”

Flanking.

“Fuck you ok! I’ll give you all the cash in my wallet right now. Watch! That’ll take care of breakfast and the stupid assed shipping. Then you can shut up.”

Attempts for a cease fire.

“You have no concern for money”


Repeated shelling. I have to stick my fingers in my ears now.

“I’m doing this because I don’t want to hear you right now. We’re settled, argument over, you get the money, quiet time now.”

An unexpected and all too early pulling out of troops. By now the battleground had shifted from the road to the car port. But as we both left the car, one last political assassination had to take place.

“This is the last time….”

She takes point.

“What is your problem!? I just ended the argument! We where finished. You just can’t keep your fucking mouth shut! I’m sorry I said ‘nominal fee’ because now you get to make your precious ‘I don’t know the value of a dollar’ bullshit fest and fucking nag me! God damnit.”

I launched into a heated political debate.

“It’s always take and want with you.”

Fabrication.

“Jesus Christ! Fine, you can’t just stop can you, you cant just shut up for once.”

Debate.

We where in the house now, and all gloves where off. One last run for the bunker.

“Greedy little ass. Idiot, idiot, idiot.”

Frenzied retaliation, last ditch, failing…… Self destruct.

“God damn you! You can’t stop can you!? You have to have the last word! You wan’t to know something mom, moron, moron, moron! There, are you happy? We both got to exchange mildly intelligence oriented insults at each other. Grow some candy out your ass, sweety!”

I’m in my room now, and the tears are flowing. A historical battle, certainly noteworthy. I feel so pointless and wrinkled, like one of those dried dates that people keep for good luck. And I’m so in love with the idea of being nice, and calm and hollow, but everything seems to vivid sometimes, don’t you think? Too clear and precise to just sail through like a blind little mouse in a corn field.

Tumble little mouse, weave and tumble. There aren’t any cats in this field. Only corn and pretty grass blades; Nothing but honey and ice cream in this field, mister blind mouse. Nothing but puffy clouds and candy sticks, little mouse. Little mouse, go home and bury your mother.

The word of the day is collapse.



Related links
· More about Experiences
· News by Squire-of-Gothos


Most read story in Experiences:
My First Threesome


Rate article
Average Rating : 1.0
Total ratings : 2

1 star


Collapse | Login/Create an account | 5 Comments
Threshold
Comments are owned by the poster. We aren't responsible for their content.
This made it through?
by MystryssRavynDarque (MystryssRavynHI@wmconnect.com)
on May 15, 2004 - 06:58 PM
(User info | Send a Message) http://kauai.vibechild.com/~amanda/
Okay, so I know I am not one to usually do this to people's submissions, but I feel it is about time I point out the things I notice.

Sometimes I notice misspellings of words, which are often typos and go unnoticed, or sometimes they are out of laziness to look the word's spelling up in a dictionary or relying too much on spell check which is not grammar check.

This time I found more than just spelling errors, and I am going to point them out so I may prove a point about the recent article submissions. I hate to use Squire as an example, but this must be done.

Okay, so here are some of the things I noticed with a little side note by me telling you all why I picked this portion of the fiction article out.

Let me get the ball rolling now with:

A woman in a red minivan parked across the lane from me, and waddled out to the building.

(The above is a sentence fragment. A portion seems to be missing which could make it work.)

and the waddling woman and red minivan where a soft new dream.

(incorrect where, were, is used)

- so without worry, that if I could have stayed at the moment forever

(the character wants to stay at the moment forever, or should it be in the moment forever)

How stupid that fucking women as the women drove down a long dark country road.

(woman or women?)

All of a sudden
- Then all of a sudden

(these are used consecutively, causing the writing to not have a very good flow)

His tire blow, his pneumatic horn destroyed,

(his tire's blown? his tire blew? what happened?)

The women hear a kind of low rumble, like a far off shotgun blast that keeps on going, and hopes her car is alright.

(how many women are in this scene? why does it seem there are two, then there is one?)

her deceleration and notices that it is dangling two and frow

(incorrect two, to, too)

And as she stick it back onto the windshield, she noticed the quick pulsing beam of a five ton hunk of steel, rocketing at her like a freight train on amphetamines, and it’s then that she wonders: What will I say when it’s all over?

("and as she stick it" perhaps and as she stuck it or replaced it?)

The truck driver, his name is Ed,

(why is his name relevant?)

I also had trouble following the plot. I don't understand where the story started or ended up or exactly what was going on. This story does not have well defined focus or sense of direction. In fact, I see lack of direction here.

I am not the queen of grammar, and I am not the queen of spelling, but it is about time someone points out the horrors of the articles lately.

The slush pile seems to be growing. There are not as many well written articles submitted, and we end up with things like this on the front page because nobody is taking the time to see if their work is worth posting.

Please, can we just have some well written articles posted? Can the slush pile melt with spring? I certainly hope so.

Also, if there any words misspelled which anyone notices, please point them out to me so I may learn from my mistakes.



Re: Collapse
by Squire-of-Gothos (Brian0049@hotmail.com)
on May 16, 2004 - 02:05 PM
(User info | Send a Message) http://
As always, nothing but critisicm on my articles, and naturally, I'm very pleased that you took the initiative and said that my aritcle is a "slush pile" piece. Thanks. I mean, your critisicm is correct, but again, thank you for the slush pile reference, and thanks for using my aritcle as a place to voice your desire for well written articles. I'm, tired of trying, ok. So you won't have to read any more horrible articles from me.

Sick of this shit, ~Squire.


Re: Collapse
by Squire-of-Gothos (Brian0049@hotmail.com)
on May 16, 2004 - 02:14 PM
(User info | Send a Message) http://
Oh, and why is the truck driver's name relevant? Because it is. I wanted to created a uephorea, a kind a fantasy, with an unusual style. I thought it would be cool. And why am I too lazy to look up the right spelling of words? Becuase I'm too dependant of the new version of Word to tell me when I misspell something. Not because I'm lazy and don't look up words. Becuase I'm LAZY. My apologies for being depressed at the time, and using nothing but pure, if not irregular and incorrect, language to try and convey my emotion at the exact time. Clearly I'm depressed now, though. Sorry for my goddamn slush.


Re: Collapse
by Alugarde (ik158102@ohiou.edu)
on May 17, 2004 - 06:40 PM
(User info | Send a Message)
I'm a little mentally drained at the moment, so I apolagize if my comment reveals some glaring oversight on my part.

I noticed the grammatical mistakes, but I spent ten minutes today sorthing through link after link of webring with sporadic splashes of punctuation around the names of the webrings, so I wasn't terribly upset by the mistakes. That, and I know how easy it is to, while proofreading, correct a mistake in your mind without even registering the fact that a mistake was found, so I chalked it up to a bit of that.

I felt the overall flow of the piece and the transition between fantasy and argument were a bit off, but the argument was a bit cathartic to read. I can't tell you how many times I had arguments like this with my mom when I was younger.

My only real complaint about the piece is that I found fantasizing about people getting into accidents and about burying your mother a bit morbid and disturbing. Mind you, I won't kill a mosquito.


 Home | Articles | Galleries | Forums | Site Info | Web Links | Reviews | Register 
All logos and trademarks in this site are property of their respective owner. The comments are property of their posters, the rest © 2001 by VibeChild.com Add shmeng_syn to your Live Journal Friends List. If you have a website check the webmasters section - You can get this site on your Palm Pilot using This link - By using this website, you are agreeing to abide by our Terms of Use. If you are a bot thinking of spamming members, get your email addresses here
Buy Viagra Without Prescription
Buy Vigra Without Prescription
Buy Viarga Without Prescription
Buy Cialis Without Prescription
Buy Clomid Without Prescription
Buy Levitra Without Prescription
Buy Propecia Without Prescription
Buy Kamagra Without Prescription
Buy Accutane Without Prescription
Buy Zithromax Without Prescription
Buy Amoxil Without Prescription
Buy Zovirax Without Prescription
Buy Deltasone Without Prescription
Buy Topamax Without Prescription
Buy Lexapro Without Prescription
Buy Flomax Without Prescription
Buy Flagyl Without Prescription
Buy Synthroid Without Prescription
Buy Inderal Without Prescription
Buy Tenormin Without Prescription
Buy Keflex Without Prescription
Buy Diflucan Without Prescription
Buy Lasix Without Prescription
Buy Celebrex Without Prescription
Buy Doxycycline Without Prescription
Buy Zocor Without Prescription
Buy Premarin Without Prescription
Buy Celexa Without Prescription
Buy Norvasc Without Prescription
Buy Hydrochlorothiazide Without Prescription
Buy Nexium Without Prescription
Buy Cytotec Without Prescription
Buy Misoprostol Without Prescription
Buy Neurontin Without Prescription
Buy Levaquin Without Prescription
Buy Zyprexa Without Prescription
Buy Astelin Without Prescription
Buy Zetia Without Prescription
Buy Diclofenac Without Prescription
Buy Antabuse Without Prescription
Buy Arimidex Without Prescription
Buy Phenergan Without Prescription
Buy Paxil Without Prescription
Buy Differin Without Prescription
Buy Nizoral Without Prescription
Buy Valtrex Without Prescription
Buy Plan B Without Prescription
Buy Fosamax Without Prescription
Buy Diovan Without Prescription
Buy Betapace Without Prescription
Buy Reglan Without Prescription
Buy Rhinocort Without Prescription
Buy Cozaar Without Prescription
Buy Accupril Without Prescription
Buy Septilin Without Prescription
Buy Zyrtec Without Prescription
Buy Aldactone Without Prescription
Buy Benicar Without Prescription
Buy Flonase Without Prescription
Buy Atacand Without Prescription
Buy Hytrin Without Prescription
Buy Ditropan Without Prescription
Buy Rumalaya Without Prescription
Buy Prinivil Without Prescription
Buy Medrol Without Prescription
Buy Revia Without Prescription
Buy Naltrexone Without Prescription
Buy Parlodel Without Prescription
Buy Atrovent Without Prescription
Buy Aciphex Without Prescription
Buy Zelnorm Without Prescription
Buy Motrin Without Prescription
Buy Avandia Without Prescription
Buy Tetracycline Without Prescription
Buy Epivir Without Prescription
Buy Lamisil Without Prescription
Buy Sinequan Without Prescription
Buy Levlen Without Prescription
Buy Levonorgestrel Without Prescription
Buy Anafranil Without Prescription
Buy Seroquel Without Prescription
Buy Acai Without Prescription
Buy Micardis Without Prescription
Buy Aleve Without Prescription
Buy Claritin Without Prescription
Buy Nimotop Without Prescription
Buy Toprol Without Prescription
Buy Colchicine Without Prescription
Buy Cipro Without Prescription
Buy Tofranil Without Prescription
Buy Zanaflex Without Prescription
Buy Tizanidine Without Prescription
Buy Remeron Without Prescription
Buy Cardura Without Prescription
Buy Femara Without Prescription
Buy Provera Without Prescription
Buy Desyrel Without Prescription
Buy Imitrex Without Prescription
Buy Famvir Without Prescription
Buy Clarinex Without Prescription
Buy Buspar Without Prescription
Buy Lotensin Without Prescription
Buy Exelon Without Prescription
Buy Combivent Without Prescription
Buy Ventolin Without Prescription
Buy Diabecon Without Prescription
Buy Cymbalta Without Prescription
Buy Prilosec Without Prescription
Buy Omeprazole Without Prescription
Buy Flovent Without Prescription
Buy Noroxin Without Prescription
Buy Glucotrol Without Prescription
Buy Plavix Without Prescription
Buy Glucophage Without Prescription
Buy Bactrim Without Prescription
Buy Myambutol Without Prescription
Buy Dostinex Without Prescription
Buy Aricept Without Prescription
Buy Actos Without Prescription
Buy Lukol Without Prescription
Buy Rogaine Without Prescription
Buy Ampicillin Without Prescription
Buy Lamictal Without Prescription
Buy Retin Without Prescription
Buy Lipitor Without Prescription
Buy Chloroquine Without Prescription
Buy Arava Without Prescription
Buy Adalat Without Prescription
Buy Strattera Without Prescription
Buy Cleocin Without Prescription
Buy Relafen Without Prescription
Buy Crestor Without Prescription
Buy Maxalt Without Prescription
Buy Singulair Without Prescription
Buy Allegra Without Prescription
Buy Protonix Without Prescription
Buy Vermox Without Prescription
Buy Estrace Without Prescription
Buy Coumadin Without Prescription
Buy Advair Without Prescription
Buy Diamox Without Prescription
Buy Coreg Without Prescription
Buy Avapro Without Prescription
Buy Leukeran Without Prescription
Buy Prevacid Without Prescription
Buy Requip Without Prescription
Buy Zantac Without Prescription
Buy Erythromycin Without Prescription
Buy Zyvox Without Prescription
Buy Prednisolone Without Prescription
Buy Amaryl Without Prescription
Buy Actonel Without Prescription
Buy Evista Without Prescription
Buy Vantin Without Prescription
Buy Starlix Without Prescription
Buy Luvox Without Prescription
Buy Abilify Without Prescription
Buy Depakote Without Prescription
Buy Lozol Without Prescription
Buy Xenical Without Prescription
Buy Lotrisone Without Prescription
Buy Betnovate Without Prescription
Buy Risperdal Without Prescription
Buy Methotrexate Without Prescription
Buy Wellbutrin Without Prescription
Buy Mobic Without Prescription
Buy Altace Without Prescription
Buy Augmentin Without Prescription
Buy Effexor Without Prescription
Buy Nolvadex Without Prescription
Buy Biaxin Without Prescription
Buy Detrol Without Prescription
Buy Zyban Without Prescription
Buy Elavil Without Prescription
Buy Lioresal Without Prescription
Buy Allopurinol Without Prescription
Buy Lanoxin Without Prescription
Viagra pills canadian
Buy cheap viagra online now
Buy viagra usa
Buy viagra online no prescription
Canada viagra generic
Canadian women viagra
Viagra online without a prescription
Overnight viagra
Cheap viagra usa
Cheap viagra 100mg
Cheap viagra onaline
Viagra 50 mg
Cheap viagra no prescription
Best price viagra
Buy cheap online viagra
Viagra canada
Cheapest prices viagra
Generic viagra online
Viagra pfizer online
Viagra pills
Lowest price viagra
Viagra for sale
Canada no prescription viagra
Buy viagra in usa
Viagra generic
How can i buy viagra online
Buy viagra in canada
Buy viagra no prescription
Canadian viagra online
Overnight canadian viagra
Buy viagra online
Female viagra pills
Discount viagra online
Canadian generic viagra
Generic viagra canada
Cheap canadian viagra
Viagra low price
Viagra canada online pharmacy
Buy viagra online now
Viagra price comparison dosage
How get viagra
Generic viagra overnight
Viagra buy online
Generic viagra price
Viagra how fast does it work
Buy discount viagra
Viagra buy viagra online order viagra
Viagra online
Cost viagra online
Viagra in canada
Viagra online deals
Purchase viagra
Purchase viagra overnight delivery
Viagra for women
Cheap viagra now
Buy viagra
Viagra price
Cost of daily viagra
Viagra brand online
Viagra tablet weight
Viagra buy
Buy viagra on line
Viagra paypal
Viagra no prescriptions
Buy viagra online canada
Viagra online canada
Cheap viagra without a prescription
Buy cheap viagra
Viagra delivered overnight
Buy viagra online usa
Viagra soft tabs online
Buy viagra uk
Cheap viagra pills
Viagra drug
Viagra online no prescription
Generic viagra professional
Order generic viagra
Natural viagra
Buy viagra online wthout prescription
original brand viagra
Buy viagra professional
Low price viagra
Best viagra price
Buy cheap canadian viagra
Next day viagra
What is viagra professional
Viagra from canada
Levitra vs viagra
Buy cheap viagra usa
Viagra lowest price
Generic cialis canada
Cialis generic
Cheap canadian cialis
Cialis 100 mg
Cialis low price
Canadian generic cialis
Cialis pills
Best price cialis
Cialis canada online pharmacy
Cheap cialis usa
Buy cialis 20mg
Buy cialis online now
Cialis price comparison dosage
Canadian women cialis
How get cialis
Generic cialis overnight
Cialis buy online
Generic cialis price
Cialis how fast does it work
Buy discount cialis
Cialis buy cialis online order cialis
Cialis online
Cost cialis online
Cialis in canada
Cialis online deals
Buy cialis online no prescription
Purchase cialis
Purchase cialis overnight delivery
Cialis for women
Cheap cialis now
Discount cialis online
Buy cialis
Cialis 5 mg
Cialis 50 mg
Cialis price
Cost of daily cialis
Cialis brand online
Cialis tablet weight
Cialis buy
Buy cialis on line
Cialis paypal
Cialis no prescriptions
Buy cialis online canada
Cialis online canada
Cheap cialis without a prescription
Buy cheap cialis
Cialis delivered overnight
Buy cialis online usa
Cialis soft tabs online
Buy cialis uk
Cheap cialis pills
cialis drug
Cialis online no prescription
Generic cialis professional
Order generic cialis
Natural cialis
Buy cialis online wthout prescription
Buy cheap online cialis
original brand cialis
Buy cialis professional
Low price cialis
Best cialis price
Buy cheap canadian cialis
Next day cialis
What is cialis professional
Cialis from canada
Levitra vs cialis
Buy cheap cialis usa
cialis lowest price
Buy cialis online
Cialis pills canadian
Buy cheap cialis online now
Buy cialis usa
Canada cialis generic
Cialis online without a prescription
Overnight cialis
Cheap cialis onaline
Cheap cialis no prescription
Cialis canada
Cheapest prices cialis
Generic cialis online
Cialis pfizer online
Lowest price cialis
Cialis for sale
Canada no prescription cialis
Buy cialis in usa
How can i buy cialis online
Buy cialis in canada
Buy cialis no prescription
Canadian cialis online
Overnight canadian cialis
Female cialis pills