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Mistress Manners: No i wont fuck you
Posted by callei on Friday, August 22, 2003 - 12:02 AM PST

Rant
I hate people that wear collars and act all “BDSM” when it is clear that they aren’t, especially the ones that walk up to me and kneel in front of me out of the blue. Get a grip. I didn’t collar you, I am not your wet dream, and, frankly, I have better things to do that sort out the confused and unformed lusts of a newbie that is sooo new that they don’t even know enough to ask first. Just to be really clear here, that is not “flirting” that is being a demanding twit and shows that you have no concern or care about the person that you are attempting to burden with your petty wants and needs.

I hate people that have just found that they get more out of sex when its kinky and want to tell me all about it. Like I care enough to listen, and applaud. I am way more likely to point out where you messed up, left damage (emotional, physical, mental, or spiritual), and why you should shut up and go apologize to your partner. And put the whip down or I will use it on you and you may love me after, but you will hate me during. I can promise you that.

I think it gets to me more when it’s a “goth” person because I expect more from them, like that they have read a book or two in their lives or something.

I LOVE people that ask me “what is it like?” or tell me “ I tried something and wow was it neat! Can I talk to you about it?” or “I am thinking about (insert idea here) a lot and I don’t know what to do about it.” I can work with that. I can be supportive, instructional (giggle), and help them over some of the rough and disorienting bits of changing their own worldview and accepting themselves.

Recently a dear friend of mine called Shade and I her “leather parents” and promised me a mother’s day card. If I ever caught her kneeling to some total stranger, I would kick her.  Not just because she is a top (and I darned good one I am proud to say), but because it would mean that her brain had totally deserted her and she needed someone to knock some sense back into her head.

There is a reason that I am the Mistress of Orgies here people. I know what I am talking about. And you don’t. I don’t mean that in a cruel way, it’s just true for a lot of you. You know what YOU mean, but not what anyone else means and you endanger yourself and others with that ignorance. And that makes me want to kick you too. I know you are smart enough to think it through and read something and ask other people. And yet you don’t.

I am assuming that you, the reader, knows what the social meaning of these words mean and that I don’t have to explain sadism or submission to you. If you don’t know, are unsure, or are only working from your own feelings then I strongly recommend reading a few books, websites, and some erotica. Then talking to people about what you have read so that you can see where your meanings are different than those of your peers and support group and, if you are lucky, your dating pool. Ask me and I can send you a list of link, a reading list, and some great sites, If you are over 18/21 (depending on the laws in your area).




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No i wont fuck you | Login/Create an account | 46 Comments
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Re: No i wont fuck you
by Psychopixi (psyche.at.psychopixi.dot.com)
on Aug 22, 2003 - 04:02 AM
(User info | Send a Message) http://psychopixi.com
How come here in the UK we have to be sixteen to have sex, but 18 to read about it? *sighs* Things will be so much better come october (my birthday). Those sites that say "Click here if you are eighteen" expect you to lie anyway, right?


Re: No i wont fuck you
by feralucce (Iwouldliketokillyou@gofuckyourself.com)
on Aug 22, 2003 - 07:51 AM
(User info | Send a Message) http://feralucce.vibechild.com

*chuckles* once again you frame the thoughts beautifully... I think the real question, at least in my mind, is why these peopel actually are attracted to the lifestyle... I personally think it's because it is a taboo... I believe they'd do it no matter what it was if it were taboo...

Feral



Re: No i wont fuck you
by daria_4 (-)
on Aug 22, 2003 - 08:26 AM
(User info | Send a Message)
I really liked the way you transitioned from talking about others to addressing the reader at the end--even if you were only using the collective you versus the personal, the use of the word at all made for a very effective bit of reading. I suppose it would be particularly powerful for anyone who should be taking it personally--hope you got through to someone. ;)


Re: No i wont fuck you
by Shade (Shade@Gothcult.com)
on Aug 22, 2003 - 09:54 AM
(User info | Send a Message) http://www.hotelshade.com
*Feverishly takes notes for the parts he has left out of Toy Dolls*


Re: No i wont fuck you
by VampCourt (Morbidchic@hotmail.com)
on Aug 22, 2003 - 10:04 AM
(User info | Send a Message) http://www.geocities.com/vampcourt/index.html?1017202482720
you know something too, Im sick of the people who think because they are all vinyl clad, it automatically means they are all hardcore s&m and bondage freaks. I know a couple people who DONT wear things such as that, they have that lifestyle in thier bedroom. -shakes head- tell em to read a friggen book.


Re: No i wont fuck you
by Merry_Widow on Aug 22, 2003 - 10:39 AM
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And Lo, for the Mistress of Orgies laid out a smackdown, and verily it was a righteous one...
I hate it when you see a little fifteen year old girl leading her pimple laden boyfriend around the mall on the leash. It irritates me to no end. Especially when you're in the bookstore, and they wander their way over to the sex book section, and loadly go through several books, saying they have already tried all of whatever is in there. It's right about then the tic in my right eye starts up.


Re: No i wont fuck you
by bettie_x (strangersangel@hotmail.com)
on Aug 22, 2003 - 05:02 PM
(User info | Send a Message) http://bettie_x.tripod.com/
Thank you thank you thank you for this.  I can't stand it either, and I swear to god if  I see another kid leading their stupid "boyfriend/girlfriend" around the MALL on a leash I'm going to tie them to a bench outside and SHOW them what S&M really is.  Yes, tie them up with the conveniently removable "bondage straps" on their pants, and flog them raw with their $5 Pet Co. leash until they cry for mommy.
You wanna know the really sick thing I saw once?  There was this girl always coming in with her stupid friends or a boyfriend on a leash, but then she came in with her LITTLE SISTER on a leash (who was proably about 10 or 12) and was telling her how she looked like NORMALS and how normals suck and that they'll make a freak out of her yet blah blah blah.  I walked over and unclipped the leash and booted her ass out of my store.  I mean jesus christ, her SISTER.  I feel for that poor child having to grow up looking up to such a retarded diluded douchebag for the rest of her life.  I'd like to give her a taste of domination for about 5 min (that doesn't involve furry plastic handcuffs from Spencer Gifts) and she'd probably never be able to even put a leash on her DOG again, let alone another human.


Re: No i wont fuck you
by Xaoswolf (Xaoswolfatvzavenuedotnet)
on Aug 22, 2003 - 07:41 PM
(User info | Send a Message) http://Xaoswolf.tripod.com
I was at a club a while back when a rather attractive little thing came up to me and said, "I've got a present for you."

Now, here I am thinking to my self. hmmm.... I wonder what it could me, maybe crack, maybe some kind of sexual favor. Only one way to find out! "And what would that be?" I ask. "Here." she said as she handed me a leash and walked off. I follow the leash and lo and behold, I was suddenly attached to some beast of lovecraftian lore! With a physical geometry that made the mind boggle and a face to inspire madness in all but those with a hefty bonus to their saving throws. A most unwelcomed gift indeed.



Re: No i wont fuck you
by Squire-of-Gothos (Brian0049@hotmail.com)
on Aug 22, 2003 - 09:00 PM
(User info | Send a Message) http://
I see this display all the time at my local theater every Saturday night. Rocky Horror Night.... This is, aparently, when all the retards and show-offs feel that the enviroment is cool enough for them to do this without hurting their street credit. So the run around with their leashes and spiked collars, talking about how much dirty things they plan on doing during the show etc etc. Utterly sad. I took the time to explain to one group that it was childish, sad, completely pointless, and that Rocky is not the do all tell all dictionary of S&M lore, its not even that great a movie, its not even really about S&M. The replies generally centered around, "What do you mean Rocky isn't cool. Dude you better not be bashing RHPS!" Sigh, Sigh, mother-flogging sigh.

Oh well. What are you going to do. Today, "extreme" sex acts aren't just pleasurable things, they're also things to flaunt so you can look cool and interesting. Bah! Double bah! Stupid fucking kids. I don't pretend to know much about S&M or Domination, but I do know that a leash and a collar doesn't mean shit. Not when its just to look cool. Carrying around a cat-o-nine tails doesn't mean you're a dominatrix, and it sure as shit doesn't mean you know how to use it. I wish, in my heart of hearts, people could just sit down, shut up, and listen every once and a while. I don't know who said it, but, "It is better not to speak and let people think you are ignorant, then to speak, and prove it"

BTW, while we're on the subject of doing reading and learning instead of just acting like some big butch master before you know shit, my girl friend is interested in being a sub, and want me to be her master, and I don't want it to be a bad experience, or to fuck her up, so is their any good reading, (book, internet, etc) I could check out before steaming full ahead. Just thought I'd ask.


Re: No i wont fuck you
by Comedian (eccentrically_long@yahoo.com)
on Aug 23, 2003 - 07:12 AM
(User info | Send a Message) http://http://
Maybe the idea of BDSM just bothers me because I'm horribly prudish.  Do what thou whilst.  In the mean time, anyone want to eat babies with me and Mike Tyson?  Today we're going to try seeing what ethnicity the tiger enjoys eating most.


Re: When walking....
by Domkitten (saradevil@saradevil.com)
on Aug 24, 2003 - 01:06 AM
(User info | Send a Message) http://www.saradevil.com

This is a fun little story so I'll share because your reminded me of much this particular person, from what I understand this is a true story as it was related to me...

It involved this man who was paying a great deal of money for a proffesional Domme, who did all the proffesional Domme things he expected, and then dressed him in a humiliating, small, and obvious leather outfit, put a leash on him, and took him out. Apparently she was going to take him to an S&M club in L.A.

While driving to said club she had to stop to ask directions, as she conviently forgot. So she took him out of the car and tied him to a pole in front of a restraunt and across the street from a park where he was making quite a scene even though he wasn't doing anything. She went in to make a phone call.

After a minute or so the police suddenly pulled up and of course, where amused and slightly peeved and asked him what he was doing there. He explained, I'm sure leaving out some detail, and waited for his Domme to return from the restaruant. As they waited they discussed what they might be able to arrest him for and if he were violating any laws.

When she did emerge she also explained that this was all between consenting adults and etc. and they were allowed to leave.  In the car as they drove away the Domme asked if the police had said anything, to which he replied "they said they didn't think there was anything illegal, except that I might be violating some leash laws."

To which she replied, "Only in L.A."



Re: No i wont fuck you
by Comedian (eccentrically_long@yahoo.com)
on Aug 25, 2003 - 09:19 AM
(User info | Send a Message) http://http://
Now here's what quirks my eyebrow: Is BDSM a sexual role-market(i.e., cosplay, furries, and other grotesque roleplayers) or is it a sexual psychosomatic market(i.e., interracial, faesces, moon ravers, and other miscreants)?


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