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| Articles: this may be Love |
Posted by
WorthlessLiar on Wednesday, July 17, 2002 - 09:17 AM PST
okay now...first i will write an introduction to this article, then i will shower and get all comfy before i produce the rest. bear with me.
introduction.
this here article will be no more than notes or random thoughts on a certain girl who has bent my life. she asked me to e-mail her while she is out of town, and i have yet to do it. i want to blow her mind with stories of lust, love, rapture...and other such spindthrift words. But there is more. i pray for help from you, the readers, that i will be lucky enough to receive comments on this and suggestions on what i could say or do for this girl to make her fall deeper into my arms. thank you for reading this much this far...but it's not over..
i shower
now....
kk, i'm back, but now i need to straighten up my bed so i can write and think in comfort. aw shucks, i forgot my soda. now it's all flat and the ice has melted. i should have taken into the shower with me. at least it was a bad soda. diet=poo. putting away laundry sucks. stupid abraham lincoln. alright, i'm finished! now let me put on a little play list appropriate for the atmosphere (john koviak, genitorturers, eva o, stenhal, switchblade symphony, advent sleep, and some damn good country) right..now. let's get started, shall we?
Dear Sweetone,
There are many ways i could start this letter, but i don’t' want to overwhelm you too quickly with some cheesy statement i pulled out of a script or the mind of someone who isn't me. So here is an anecdote I think you'll enjoy.
I was cleaning the bathroom earlier, and decided that little sliver of soap in our soap dish just couldn't cut it anymore, so a replacement became imminent. Shifting and fishing through all of my sisters disgusting piercing cleaning fluids and make-up removal whatnots, I finally found one. Unboxed and unlabeled upon its skimpy beige wrapper, I grew curious of its existence. I thought it silly to get so excited over such a meaningless bar of soap (it wasn't).
I unwrapped this soap, surprised to see it was bright orange, disgustingly bright orange. The color actually reminded me of the orange sherbet I ate at my grandmother's house the night before. I took the soap in my hand and rolled it over to read the inscription......"1st Date". First Date? i asked myself where this came from. Have you ever heard of a soap called first date? For whatever reason the company entitled their product first date was beyond me. Then i saw the power behind the soap. I saw myself lying on the floor of the bathroom, on our little black shaggy rug that lies over the pumpkin pastel colored tiles interlaced with off-white grout. I was finding my memories.
My first date. When was it? Who was it with? I flipped through moments of my life much like a rolodex. I thought, who was my first girlfriend. No, I never went anywhere with her. She didn't count, we didn't date long enough. She never even kissed me. Wait. That's it, I found it. Becky Fryer- 9th grade- Florida Renaissance Festival in Vizcaya Gardens.
Now I'm being pummeled with media saved in my mind's eye. Thank you good lord, that was such a tight day (excuse it, but tight is the best description because the whole time i was with her i had that "tight" feeling you get in your heart when you decide you will do anything for this girl, all she needs to do is ask, because your trust has spilled all over the feet of the one you think is <strike>heaven</strike>). I followed her everywhere, craving to feel her tongue on my lips one more time, each time that I felt it.
Following in Fla RenFest tradition, It rained heavily (7 years in a row). The masses ran under tents to avoid the dangerous arsenal of water pummeling onto painted faces, vintage miami twice clothing, swords, frozen lemonades and sunglasses that could never be confused with an accessory remotely matching anything on it's bearer's body. Becky and I didn't hide. Our youth and our loins got the best of us. Tossed out onto the middle of the human chess board, she mounted me and kissed me, moistening the rain already covering my eyes and lips. I took her by the hand and we ran to the gardens. WE rolled over flowers as we kissed and held each other, and no one dared come out into the rain to tell us not to trample the flowers. We did not care about the all the pretty flowers. We only saw each other, and ourselves, reflected in the other's eyes. We tasted ourselves on the other's tongue. We smelled each other on the other's breath. Suddenly I became conscious of the eyes beating us, again. I took her by the hand and lead her away. And it was there, in front of the swordsman and blacksmiths, that I planted my hands on either cheek and kissed her nose. I had to do it- so I threw her into the bay, and followed after her topless. (for those of you who don't know what this place looks like, The vizcaya house was the really rich guy’s home in the movie Ace Venture, Pet Detective, the part where he gets attacked by the shark in the tank. This house next door neighbor on the left is Madonna. You can see the water we were in the first picture at Vizcaya Museum.) I dove deep. Freezing, I swam to her. I never imagined Biscayne Bay could be so cold. We were both shivering, but holding each other. I really began to feel like Jack Dawson, holding Rose for the last time. After all, that was the last time I was with her, as her boyfriend.
Becky taught me a lot of things. I learned to value a relationship based on the memories it produces, what you learn to avoid, and the ideas it may produce for use on future dominations. That was a wonderful memory, despite how awful the person I spent it with was. She dates 12 other people that year, and i didn't date anyone until a long while later.
Amelia, you're probably wondering why I am telling you this. Lord help me if this sounds unbelievable, but I am about to speak truth.
All of these memories I had of that day were of a girl without a face. I could see lips, eyelashes, and chattering teeth, but it wasn't becky. I remembered the warmth of her touch that day. Even when only her hand was grabbing my arm, i felt arm in that icy, tropical depression-ridden, water. But I could remember that warmth at any other time I was with her.
This brought me to you. I saw my self sitting atop that slide with my lips to your lower abdomen with you sitting on my emotions. Our Bearers were aligned, and I again was topless. You warmed me there. You’re warmed more than my body. You're warming me now. This memory is killing the efforts of my air conditioner.
So what I am saying is, even tho i was physically with becky at that time in medieval history, now I am with you. I can replace her face with yours and her tongue with ours. It was your warmth I remembered, and it is your warmth that is letting me write this.
Thank you being more to me than you know you are. We only were together twice, but you gave me enough to relive my memories better than I ever have. I owe much more than I can give, but I will do my best to be everything you need or want.
I want you hear with me so we can plan our future. Soon my memories will grow stale, and I will have to build some more. I want you to be a part of them.
So please darling, make memories with me.
Each night before you go to bed my baby, whisper a little prayer for me my baby.
I already do it for you
your nicholas
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
so guys and gals, what do you think? I got so teary eyed writing this. :[ damn i wish my baby was here. stupid visitations of family in arizona. Why can't her aunt and uncle live in miami, near me, like, down the block? oh well.
so tell me, do any of you thin this could be love? I want to do this with her the right way. No sex, no fooling around, no lies. I have to do this with her the right way.
Actually the song I'm listening to right now is a perfect example of what i want with this girl- Mark Chestnutt's "She Was". Please download this song if you want to cry, but let me warn you, it's country. so, ladies and gents, let me wrap this up. I won't edit this, because I'm too afraid it'll be really bad, so I hope you can help me out with it. Thank you for reading this.
i appreciate it, and more so i appreciate you.
thank you,
goodnight.
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| Note: Feeling soft today, I posted this despite the zillion typos (I fixed most of them). -ickgirl |
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| this may be Love | Login/Create an account | 14 Comments |
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Re: this may be Love
by MorteAscendo on Jul 17, 2002 - 09:37 AM
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Well let me start with this: It is a nice letter and heart felt but in my experiance with women, never ever compare them to other women. I wouldnt say anything like imagining her face on another girls face from the past. In my expericance that prolly wouldnt go down that great. I wouldnt even write saying anything about an ex-girlfriend...its the Jealousy issue that comes with women with other women. I knew i found the right girl when i could talk to her about other chicks and she would honestly tell me what she thinks (bi chicks are great) but hey, you asked for advice and so there is my 2 cents. Thats all just in my experiance, mebbe its true or mebbe i just dated so really odd girl...either way i hope i helped at all..if not..my bad!! ;-)
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Re: this may be Love
by Dolorosa on Jul 18, 2002 - 05:14 PM
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In the immortal words of Admiral Ackbar, from Return of the Jedi..."It's a Trap!"
Run run run run RUN!!!
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Re: this may be Love
by Alugarde (SoulCiphyr@aol.com)
on Jul 18, 2002 - 09:00 PM
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Are you asking for suggestions on what to say or what not to say? I ask because of the part where you said
"but i don't want to overwhelm you too quickly with some cheesy statement i pulled out of a script or the mind of someone who isn't me"
I would say don't mention ex girlfriends. Just write what you feel.
Oh, and you shouldn't be praying for comments. If theres some substance to your article people will comment regardless of your prayers. :p
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Re: this may be Love
by Zander (zandriod@aagothic.net)
on Jul 19, 2002 - 03:27 AM
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I wasn't aware of the fact that jealousy was the effect of ex-girlfriend talk.
From what I understand, it is just unhealthy to speak of past relationships.
make her feel like she is the only woman on earth.
when she see's how beautifuly you can express your feelings to her she is sure to melt, so long as it comes from you.
IT sounds like you two could be very happy together... good luck.
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Re: this may be Love
by ickgirl on Jul 19, 2002 - 11:06 AM
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as a woman, I feel I must post here.
I absolutely LOVE when my lover/significant other/date/etc can talk about their past lovers, et al. with me. It doesn't make me feel jealous at all.
some of my very favorite conversations have been the middle of the night several hour discussions about past relationships (even if the other person is chain smoking and talking non-stop *wink*)
if anything, i feel much closer to someone after such talks. now, i dont want to be compared, that's for damn sure (unless you want to tell me how much better *I* am, heh)
all relationships are different, I suppose for some this is NOT a healthy approach (and i'm imagining for those people, neither is their relationship).
this is just my opinion, i'm not sure if i'm a "normal" girl.
-icky
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Re: this may be Love
by forthemoment on Jul 23, 2002 - 08:09 PM
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From a girl's opinion that isn't talking from experience, that's right, you shoulnd't compare them to another girl. Haven't you ever seen "Clerks"? You wouldn't want to hear she's given 36 BJs, you being the last on the list. Your letter does sound really sweet. It's very loving, but what is this. You dreamed about your first date while you were with her? It's like you suddenly snapped to reality and told yourself, "Wait, I'm with this girl right now." So youput her face on someone else's and everything is aaalright...
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