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Re: I feel... like one of them
by bettie_x (strangersangel@hotmail.com)
on Aug 23, 2001 - 02:25 PM
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I actually work in retail, and I outfit big boys every day in nice and outstanding clothes that won't make them look like monkeys. I always try to help them, 'cause i hear all the time "you don't have clothes for someone my size"
I inform them we have pants usually up to size 42, sometimes up to size 3X, shirts up to 3X, shoes up to size 12, and big rings, bracelets and necklaces. I make big boys that don't think they can find clothes happy everyday.
I know there is this big stigma and retarded "anti hot topic" sentiment for whatever reason (after all we do all love to get our panties in a wad over ANYTHING, me included), but we now have a women's plus size store called Torrid carrying women's sizes 16 and up, and we've been testing the men's plus sizes in our regular stores which is doing really well. Stop in and ask sometime, and you'll be pleasantly suprised. Granted, everything may not be in your size, but hit the website for christ's sake and see what's available. I'm just stating a point....as a small person myself, it's not just the big kids that can't find clothes. Try being 5'2 and 110lbs and walking on your pant legs....boo hooo, poor undersized me :)
If you feel part of a "tribe" that's fine! I must be in the "don't give a shit" percentage, but it was the "us against them" ...oh..hell for lack of a better word ...vibe that I picked up on it.
Yes, it's very important to have an exterraneous family type structure in your life, to feel a part of something, but too many people take it way too far, and the group becomes their personality, the group becomes an entity, sometimes for the better, sometimes for the worse.
My real only problem with the whole deal was the "when I saw she was one of us" (not going to bother to go back and quote the whole goddamned thing, I'm lazy), it bugged me. It comes back to the hornet's nest....does clothing alone make someone part of the pack?
Yes, sometimes an identifying factor, but still.....if she thought the same, liked the same things etc. but was a jeans and t shirt or business suit kind of girl 24/7, how would you ever know, how would you ever think to give her a chance if the "one of us" tribe bit is relative only if you look like the rest of them? THAT'S where I picked up the superficiality. I have friends that don't look like I do...hell, I don't have ANY friends besides my husband that dress like I do, but we go deeper than that. My best friend since third grade works in an auto part yard reception office, listens to carly simon and the cars, and is a jeans and t shirt kind of girl....the exact opposite of me, but we're unseparable. We go deeper than that.
I'm sooo not trying to grill you, I'm just trying to understand the "tribe" bit you mentioned in a curious sort of way.....from someone who's never really fit into the tribe, nor wants to (don't take that the wrong way)
HUMANITY is a tribe, though sometimes it doesn't feel that way. The human is the only animal that completely and totally and GENETICALLY lacks instincts. Period. If all human women had the "mothering" instinct, little girls wouldn't be tossing their newborns in trash cans at prom. Just a case in point. We have reactions, everything does, but in the deffinition of "instinct", we are barren.
Like I said, maybe it's just me that I don't get the whole tribe herd group bit. I don't buy it, maybe because I've never been a part of it. Maybe because the only people I've run into in real life that are in the clique are complete fucking assholes....the ones that sulk into my store pretending they are ubergoth and anti hot topic, but spend about 300 clams on the store they can't stand, being helped by a "poser". I had to deal with some bitchwad that was like that yesterday, and all I could think of is "god, glad I never got wrapped up in all THAT bs."
Nitzche is fun to read, makes some good philosophical poin
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