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Re: Dolorosa's Guide to Self Defense
by Xaoswolf (xaoswolfathotmaildotcom)
on Aug 28, 2006 - 07:52 AM
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http://the_xaoswolf.1up.com
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I thought that you just yelled "Moon Make-up Magic", and poof, she'd be wearing a sailor suit. Then you could have your way with her.
Magic wand, tuxedo and dozen roses would be required on your end...
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Make the scary throat noise....AAAAAAAUUUUGGGH
by Dolorosa (SixOfSwords@IU.zzn.com)
on Sep 24, 2006 - 04:35 AM
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I've run into a few of these, and a couple of important points need to be realized.
Firstly, "Scary Girls" rely primarily on a disturbing mein and/or sound effect to demoralize their prey, they are scary...for a reason, it allows them to engage and eliminate targets with ease that can only be matched by the south african glacial bears.
Secondly, they're like freaky double jointed, I shit you not...I knew this one girl who could tie herself into a freaking knot in half a heartbeat. It was an ability I verified frequently in the name of science.
In the end, they are not physically anymore dangerous than your average garden gnome, sans acid breath of course. My suggestion is to apply their own tactics against them. Hide in a closet or something, and when the scary girl jumps out of the laundry hamper to scare you, jump out and say "RAAAAH!" I tried this on my sister once, she peed...it's effective. Also, when they do that shitty cell phone thing, just call back and demand to know if they're the chick that gave you herpes, the calls should stop after that. Internet chick? Spam the bitch, no creepy no-eyed scary girl freak can maintain her fearsome inertia after being deluged with questions regarding her penis size. Lastly, if your getting attacked by a VCR transmissable scary chick, then you deserve to die...get a dvd player.
Bullet points.
Preemptive Counter Tactics.
Uncomfortable and Hostile Accusations vs Cell Phone.
Email Spam and Pr0n Downloads vs Computer Girl.
Seppuku vs. VCR girl.
versus a brain attacking chick I can only suggest that you actually transplant your brain with that of a common rhesus monkey, which can be purchased in your local grocery store's frozen goods section...that'll give the bitch something to deal with.
Don't let em scare you, thats how they win...if all else fails, go tonya harding on her.
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