|
|
Re: Dolorosa's Guide to Self Defense
by Dolorosa (SixOfSwords@IU.zzn.com)
on Sep 24, 2006 - 04:43 AM
(User info | Send a Message)
|
First off, the ribs are to increase the "Stun Friction" factor of the condom by ocillating local air currents into a hostile agitation pattern. Witty remarks about Linux would be clever, but also a low blow, similiar to yelling at a retarded kid for being retarded...effective but perhaps a bit declasse'
Happy Happy Joy Joy can increase your survival rating by alternating your physical location frequently with sudden shifts of movement, be warned however that since this movement is rythmic, the penguin will eventually learn to anticipate your movements.
I must address the fact that while a penguin may be a gang member, or a something-other-than-what-it-might-look-like-at-the-moment it is still a penguin. Engage and defeat the penguin in the proscribed manner UNLESS it reveals itself to be in fact something-entirely-different-then-what-it-was-just-a-second-ago. In that case engage as neccesary as to it's current existing type.
Also might I suggest Counter-reverse-semi-Parallel-Jungian-Counter-Referencing your Vespa before reverse-parallel parking it. That should buy you enough time to further assess your hostile.
|
|
|