Kathymom
Date Thursday, March 28, 2024 - 04:12 AM PST
Topic Religion


I met Kathymom in a coffee shop of course. She was behind the counter and we were just outside the door. Laura was talking to someone and I was waiting. She came out from behind the counter and walked straight up to me. She leaned in and whispered, "Would you tell her that she is the most beautiful girl I've ever seen in my life?", and pointed to Laura. I shook my head no.


I whispered back, "She wouldn't believe me - you'll have to do it yourself".

I watched in amusement as she turned and spun Laura around in mid conversation. She proceeded to explain to a shocked Laura exactly how beautiful she was. She was looking Laura right in the eyes, but she wasn't flirting, her vibe was purely maternal. She seemed to know exactly what to say. She used words that my 20 year old brain never would have thought of. The normally insecure Laura was glowing and smiling so big I thought her cheeks would break. Then Kathymom winked at me and slipped back behind the counter. Laura glowed for the rest of the week. The sex that night was amazing. I won't say that her insecurity was fixed, but it was a part of her recovery that I could never have helped with on my own. That was the first time I'd ever seen that kind of Saggittarius in action and I was amazed.

Not long later, I'd made a new friend and discovered that Kathymom lived in the house behind her. I'd see Kathymom once in a while when I was over there, but I still didn't know much about her other than that she had an annoying 13 year old daughter who really wanted to hang out with us big kids.

One day I was over there looking grumpy and Kathymom asked me what was up. I told her that I had lost my wallet last night and I went back today and couldn't find it. She asked where, and I told her. She obviously knew, but instead of asking what me and my new friend were doing in that field at night which might have jostled my wallet out of my pants - or asking what adventure Laura was on while we were doing it, she gave me a look like she knew everything and said, "forget about it and someone will probably get it back to you tomorrow". Of course I didn't believe that for a second.

The next day Laura and I were on our way to the new friend's house and we stopped to check the mail. There was a small package addressed to me with no return address - just a stamp for two dollars in postage. I opened it and there was my wallet. Only two dollars were missing. I told Laura what Kathymom had said, and we both sat there shocked for a few. Then we drove the rest of the way.

When we got there, Kathymom was talking to our friend's mom. I went right up to her and showed her my wallet and asked how she knew. She didn't answer. Instead she grabbed my hand and dragged me outside. She led me over to a small tree and had me put my hands on it. She said, "What do you feel?".

I said, "A tree".She smirked at me.

I said, "ok, rough tree bark".

She cocked her head and kept smirking.

I said, "it's swaying a little when the wind blows". I didn't know what answer she expected, but she kept smirking.

I said, "swirly stuff".

She quit smirking and reached over and grabbed the tree. She said "It is kinda swirly isn't it? Let me know when you're ready for more."

Then she walked back over to her house and I went back inside completely confused. I thought maybe she was just loopy but I distinctly felt that swirly stuff.

When I got home, I went for a walk. I walked out in the field by my house to the biggest tree I knew of and leaned against it. I closed my eyes and searched for the swirly stuff. It wasn't even remotely there. It took me a while before I realized this tree wasn't swirly at all. It was straight up and down and damm solid, and not just solid like a tree. I leaned against it and practically melted into it. I don't think I'd ever felt that strong or stable. After a while, I walked back to the house giggling about how I now understood more about the whole "tree hugger" thing than most tree huggers I knew.

I still had no clue what this had to do with my wallet.

About two years later, Laura and I finally broke up. I was naturally a little dazed and lost for a while. When you spend every minute with someone for that long, it takes a while to get your identity back. I ran into Kathymom one day, and she knew exactly what was up. She gave me her new address and told me to come over on Sunday and meet people.

I showed up and she introduced me around. Her son was big and shaggy like a german shepard. Danielle didn't say much, just looked at the floor a bit. Her daughter didn't look nearly as annoying and 13 as she did two years ago. Then the pretty hippie came up and gave me a huge hug. It felt like a kitten jumped out of her sternum and through mine and started batting at my heart when she pressed her chest to mine. I turned to Kathymom with a shocked look, but all I could say was "um... kitten?"

Kathymom giggled and said "I know, it's neat isn't it? Don't fall in love, she's a lesbian".

I blushed profusely and let her hug me some more while Kathymom started explaining to me what was going on. She said that every Sunday she got all her kids together to show them how their magic worked. (Obviously only 2 of them were really her kids).

I looked around at everyone like "is she loopy?" I got no confirmations of loopyness, so I looked around at everyone like "are you ALL loopy?"

I was still looking confused but I had nothing better to do so I played along. Kathymom started showing everyone how to ball up vibe and pass it back and forth. I was going through the motions and pretending kitten girl and I were passing a ball back and forth and rolling it around between our hands. Then it started feeling extremely warm and heavy, like there really was a ball there. I looked up at kitten girl all surprised and she smiled at me. When she smiled, the warm heavy ball instantly felt like a kitten and I jerked my hands away. She swirled her hands around like she was catching the ball I had dropped, and pushed it into my chest. My eyes got huge and it felt like someone just zapped me with kitten flavored electricity.

Kathymom was laughing and said "don't scare the poor boy. Come on kids, we need to go to the store." She gathered up everyone except for me and Danielle and said they'd be back in a few. Danielle continued to stare at the floor while I tried to talk to her. It didn't work. Then we looked at each other and for some reason couldn't tear our eyes away. We kept staring at each other's eyes, and it looked like her face went translucent. I could see the bones under her skin. Then I could see more than that. It was scary.

She looked terrified, but she didn't look away either. Then we started talking. We completely skipped the fluffy conversation and she started telling me all of my secrets, and I started telling her hers. We were pretty much talking simultaneously, but listening too. I have no clue how I knew any of it, it just all came pouring out. We were sitting cross legged on the massage table facing each other, holding hands, and staring at each other some more when everyone came back. Kathymom and kitty girl smiled real big when they saw us, and shaggy and the 15 year old seemed to pout a bit.

Everyone went to put away groceries except the 15 year old who stayed and explained to me that Danielle and her brother were kinda together so I should be careful.

When everyone came back out, Kathymom showed us some more weird things. Then I finally went home and thought about Danielle for about a week.

Of course I was back the next Sunday. This time shaggy was gone and a new boy, Josh arrived after me. Kathymom was introducing him to us and I looked at him, then looked at Danielle (who was looking at the floor some more), and thought "those two are getting married".

Kathymom showed us more strange things, mostly involving how to feel where people's shmeng is and how to rip it out. When they had me on the massage table as the gunnnea pig, I could feel them pulling stuff out that I didn't even know was there. Afterwards, I got up feeling like I'd just had a great massage, even though nobody had touched me. She showed us how to shake it out when we felt it crawling up our arms, and how to run our hands under water for a while after we were done so we didn't keep any of it. It was seeming less weird the more I saw - and actually feeling what each thing felt like instead of just hearing people talk about it in stupid hippie terms was very educational.

A few people had to go, but I didn't have anywhere to be, so we went in the living room to watch a movie. I noticed everyone was very snugly, so I wasn't surprised at all when Danielle came over and laid down on the couch with me. A little while into the movie, she turned towards me and pretended to go to sleep. I knew she wasn't asleep, but I'm sure nobody else noticed. I felt the spot where her chest was touching mine start getting warm and feel like the ball that kitty girl and I were playing with. Then the spot below her bellybutton did the same thing. I relaxed and closed my eyes, and it felt like the stuff was coming out her chest and going through my body and back into hers below her navel. It felt really good, so we just laid there like that until the movie was over. With the way she was laying, she couldn't have missed that I was very turned on, and it was obvious that she was too, but neither of us moved at all. When we were done, it felt like I'd just had amazing sex.

I kept going back every week. I learned some very interesting things, and got to be really good friends with all of Kathymom's 'kids'. Danielle and I had 'vibe sex' as much as we could, and neither Josh nor shaggy seemed bothered by it. One night when I stuck around afterwards, Danielle had gone to take a nap, and Kathymom sent me in there to wake her up. I was about to shake her but she looked so peaceful, I just crawled in bed with her. I put my hand down her pajama bottoms and started stroking slowly. After a few minutes she started moaning a bit and opened her eyes. She wrapped her arms around me and kissed me. She said "that was such a nice way to wake up". I got out of bed and went back in the other room. I know that Kathymom knew exactly what was going on, but the boys didn't. That was how it was supposed to be. They had to work this all out between them without me being in the way. We pretty much cooled it after that.

I started spending a lot more time over there, and when I started spending the night, the only places for me to sleep were in Danielle's room, or in Kathymom's daughter's room. I probably could have slept on the couch, but Kathymom obviously wanted me in her daughter's room, so that's where I slept. It made sense at the time. Obviously it didn't take long at all until we were VERY cozy. The age of consent in Hawaii was 14 back then and she was 15, but it was still a little strange. We never had sex in that house, but it had to happen eventually. She of course lied and said I wasn't her first and I believed her, but about 10 years later I was talking to both of them, and they both told me they were really glad it was me.

A while later I got sick. It wasn't one of those little mainland colds, it was a tropical flu thing - the kind that knock you on your ass for a week and make you see things. I knew I wasn't going to be able to take care of myself, and my dad and brother weren't very good at that stuff so I couldn't go over there. Somehow I dragged myself to Kathymom's doorstep. I don't remember much from that week other than her making me a lot of scrambled eggs, and her daughter petting me a lot. I remember waking up to a very concerned looking Kathymom asking me if I was ok. I said, "I'm fine, I'm gonna go play football now." I tried to get up and fell back down. Kathymom looked extremely worried, but giggled and I passed out again. She must have done something right though because I recovered pretty quick after that.

Pretty soon it was my birthday and they all asked me what I wanted. I told them "a blonde". That's what I've been asking for every year since I can remember (Laura never got me one). They all made me a blue jello birthday cake with a blonde barbie inside. I was grumpy but I was amused and ate it.

Around this time Kathymom's quiet boyfriend got hurt at work. There was a lot of insurance money and a lot of painkillers. Kathymom quit teaching us kids and started using all her energy on him. It didn't take long for it to become obvious that the drugs had him, and that it was more than just the painkillers.

I met my blonde, not too long after that and got pretty wrapped up with her. She was everything I had asked for for my birthday, and a bunch of things I didn't ask for. I resolved to be more careful next time I asked a magic lady to conjure me a girlfriend (the next two times were much better).

I started seeing them less. Kathymom was busy with her man, and her daughter started seeing other boys. We still saw each other for years when we were single enough, and snuggled when she spent the night, but we never had sex after that. I worked with her brother a bit, and he crashed on my couch for extended periods of time. The other kids just drifted off. Last I heard Danielle and Josh were still together, but that was a few years ago. Every time I would visit though, Kathymom seemed more and more worn down. She is the most magical person I've ever met, but obviously even she was no match for heroin.

I eventually moved away and have been doing my own thing for a while. I was back visiting a few years ago and saw them. Kathymom looked good but obviously wasn't doing anything like what she was doing before. When I hugged her, I could feel a little spark, but not the electrical rush she used to have.

A few weeks ago, a friend from back home was visiting. She's got the same kind of magic Kathymom does. She's younger, but she explains esoteric things in the same matter of fact way. She baby sits the daughter's little girl once in a while (the daughter's now in her late 20's), and recently had a fling with shaggy boy. Everyone knows Kathymom is magic, and most people from there know who she is. If something's fucked up, most people's advice is "go see Kathy, she'll fix it". I figured my friend would know, so I asked her how Kathymom was doing.

She said, "Kathy's dying. She quit doing what she's supposed to do and it gave her cancer. She's not doing very well I'm afraid. I hurt my back a while ago and went to get Kathy to fix it. It didn't work, and even she seemed surprised. I guess that's what happens..." This is all much more interesting when you know that my friend just got over her second round of cancer, and is doing fine and just starting to use her voodoo.

I know I should take that answer with a grain of salt, but there's no doubt in my mind that the cancer is from not using her magic. Being around the woman was like being in a microwave oven. If she hasn't been letting that stuff out, it's no surprise at all that it would give her cancer.

I'm planning on going back next summer. I really hope I get to see her.

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