EMPSK's
Date Thursday, March 28, 2024 - 03:25 PM PST
Topic Experiences


Living with my folks for the past couple of month after my return from the military has spawned a few interesting events. So far, it's fairly easy...they respect my privacy, and I theirs. My mom has a hard time accepting the fact that I'm planning on leaving again soon, but she supports me well. In all honesty, no fights or anything like that...but recently something interesting and kind of funny popped up. While looking in my room for her boom box, my mom came across my EPSKs, and they confused the hell out of her. For those not in the know, EPSK stands for "Emergency Paranormal Situation Kit".
The first one is an old WWII German medical bag, sturdy canvas, and stuff. Inside it are three sharpened wooden stakes, a crucifix complete with a lil' Jesus on it. Two vials of old holy water, a squirt gun and a homemade napalm hand grenade strapped to a lighter I tinker with. I'm pretty sure you can guess what EPSK 1 is used for.

The second is in my old duffel bag laying on the floor, in it is a broken down aluminum spear thats about six feet long when fully put together. Next to it is a silver coated spike I made by melting some of my old jewelry down and coating a railroad spike. As if that wasn't enough, I have few bundles of wolfbane, and two silver bullets I bought at a second hand ghetto shop. EMPSK 2 is probably my favorite and definitely the most expensive all together.

EMPSK 3 is in a satchel I got at a shrine in Japan, neat little thing made out of heavy paper, decorated with all sorts of pretty Kanji words. It holds two small statues of Buddha, a compass, some rice and a few wish scrolls from the Kyoto shrine. A tiny pocket mirror, two steel arrowheads, and a sharp efficient knife. Various other odds and ends are in there, as well as a small but precious amount of sand from my favorite beach in Okinawa. Although probably the cheapest all around, EMSPK 3 carries a lot of nostalgia in it.

The fourth caused the most problems with her...since she actually looked in that one. Not too many kids carry around mummified human fingers. At least I think they're human, they could be monkey fingers. That one has bailing wire, a paintbrush, voodoo doll, a book on Spanish for Beginners and Conversational Creole. There are Lots of needles, some fabric, as well as a catholic votary candle that depicts one of my favorite saints, ST. Jude. It also has a loaded magazine with some 9.mm soft tip rounds in it in case negotiations go sour. EMPSK 4 is my Voodoo/Santeria kit.

Mom was worried about them and confronted me later. Now, don't get me wrong, my ma is pretty damn open-minded, and it's from her side of the family I get my metaphysical edges. But these bothered her so she asked me about 'em. She kinda stumbled around it for a bit then finally blurted out, "What the fuck are those things!? Do you believe in that stuff?" I looked her square in the eye with a grin on my face and said, "It pays to be prepared...I may or may not believe in 'em, but I sure as hell don't want to get caught with my pants down."

It ended up in a pretty amusing way, I explained what they were for...One for vampires, one for werewolves, one for ghosts and one for bad mojo and stuff. I admitted they weren't complete, but better that than nothing right? Well, her reaction surprised the hell out of me. She decided that the idea was pretty sound, suggested a few others and decided that they should be put in the hall closet for easier access.
So thats where they are now, middle of the hall closet...just in case.

It's weird really...maybe I'm not as crazy as I think I am...or maybe it's just hereditary yeah?
In any case...anyone have any ideas for more of the things. I'm half thinking I could make some money off this idea.


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