Patchouli
Date Thursday, March 28, 2024 - 12:10 PM PST
Topic Icky People


Patchouli, who thought this, was a good idea? I want to find him, kick his ass, and then drown him in a vat of the stuff. Except I couldn't stand to get near him for the stench. Since the mid-eighties some olfactory terrorists have been replacing the bath with the patchouli bottle, first it was a light brushing of oil behind the ears to lend that delightfully earthy, moldering human flesh scent to the air around them. Now this may sound delightfully goth to those of you who have never smelled this evil scent before, but let me assure you it is not.

The smell of patchouli is like that of nothing on this earth. It smells like one would imagine rot and corruption to smell on a hot day. The worst part is that it is usually ladled on in the hope it will cover up the scent of human decay. Most of the worst offenders I have had the misfortune to come within a few city blocks of have poured it over their heads rather than shower and remove the days old sweat and dead skin cells that are causing such an unpleasant undertone to the already nasty oil scent you just want to leave the state and nuke it from a foreign country.


Patchouli, an East Indian mint, has a musty fragrance and is found in many perfumes. This is not a valid argument for making it it's own scent, do you know what else is vital to the creation of most perfumes? Ambergris. Ambergris is used as a base note and fixative in perfumery. Do you know what Ambergris is? It's sperm whale vomit, it's the lining of their intestinal tract, it's the rubbery crap that is supposed to keep their stomachs from getting torn up by the beaks of squid. Go ahead, rub yourself in that you bloody hippie, I dare you.

This article comes from Shmeng
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