A Curious Interlude Date Friday, April 19, 2024 - 08:49 PM PST Topic Experiences I was actually watching a movie tonight on the tube (a rarity) when I got hit with some really severe emotions. The movie was about Aileen Wuoros, the so-called "First Woman Serial Killer". It hit home because a lot of what she had been through that got her to where she was, were things that I had experienced in my young-adulthood. I've always been free to all about my life. Maybe because I need to talk about it (partly) and maybe because I hope that someone could learn from it and not go through what I've been through (partly also)... Aileen Wuorus should be a Saint and Martyr for ALL abused women. She DID what I am certain many women fantasize about (I know I do) which is killing the people who raped/hurt her. Then, because she reacted upon her heinous childhood and the abnormal situations she was in, they put her on death row. Now, I'm not saying everyone should go on a killing rampage (if I were I would be on death row beside her at this minute!) but DAMN she had balls! And I admire that. Anyhow, in this movie they show the obligatory child-hood history of Aileen, the flashbacks she had, and her situation that brought her to where she is now. A lot of that was stuff that I'd experienced. I got really weepy over it. It hurt to have my own memories (which I so conveniently stuff) brought to the surface. Sometime during the movie, I decided to look this woman up on the Web, and damned if I didn't find hundreds of sites on her! I perused each one, and kept the facts of their commonalities in my head. I even got her address and wrote her a letter. I hope she responds. When a person (because men go through it too, it's just not talked about as much...macho-ism is stupid as fuck) goes through severe abuse during childhood, and then ends up on the street as a teen, the whole thing stinks. No matter how tough you are, there are people who survive off of taking advantage of young people. Trauma builds upon trauma until a person becomes some kind of mess. Each mess is different (my GF is very tough and butch...I am a weepy, emotionally unstable mess) but the mess is still there, even if the person doesn't choose to recognize it. They are reacting in the best way they can to abnormal circumstances. I would like to say I condone the murder of those who prey on innocence. I hope that doesn't make me too evil. I hope that if anyone who reads this is thinking about leaving home that they look up my e-mail and write me. I'll let you know what I've been through, and believe me, it can happen to you, too! It happens to hundreds of kids every day. No matter how shitty your home life is, being on the streets is NOT the answer. It is NOT freedom...it's another form of prison, and the wardens are really out to get you for keeps. If things are really that bad, GO TO SOMEONE! Another family member, a teacher, someone you trust...even just a good friend (and if you don't have a good friend, pick an okay one.) Get the hell out of your situation; just don't compound the damage by being stupid and getting hurt worse by going out into the world. There are few to no jobs, housing is limited and outrageously priced (you can't afford a place by working at McDonald's) and living under a bridge is just plain gross (been there, done that.) You can't really DO anything until you're 18 anyway. And the people who live on the streets (like the lifestyle) are LOSERS and LETCHES. I can say that from experience also. DON'T DO DRUGS. DON'T DRINK. None of that will make your pain go away...the pain catches up to you in time...experience again talking. Also, don't think that just because you have sex with someone that they will automatically love you and accept you...sex does not equal acceptance and love...sex is sex, and you will be taken severely advantage of if you mix it up with any of the above. They may SAY they love you or want you, but unless you really know them, and have gotten to like them, and they like you, and you're friends...they're just using you. Men, especially, will say anything to get some pussy. You gotta like yourself for yourself, and not look for that acceptance from without...people are notorious for lying. Okay, I guess that's all for now. If you are planning on leaving and have no one to talk to, e-mail me, okay? I'll listen. I'm not judgmental. I just have been through that hell, and now in my 30's I am having to deal with the fallout, and I would like to keep that from happening to you, if I can. This article comes from Shmeng http://www.shmeng.com/ The URL for this story is: http://www.shmeng.com/modules.php?op=modload&name=News&file=article&sid=318