Comedian
Fanatic Posts: 213 Registered: 31/12/1969 Status: Offline
|
posted on 6/7/2002 at 12:12 AM |
DO what all professionals do: carry a bicycle spoke and a lighter.
After you knock the perp out you heat the sharpened bicycle spoke under the
lighter until you think itīs hot as itīs gunna get. Then, systematically
perform acupuncture on certain glands in their bodies. By stabbing just
above the groin area and tilting downwards in towards the base of their
tailbone, you can easily puncture their prostate gland, ensuring that
arousal and urination become extremely painful experiences for them.
Lifting up the left arm and impaling inwards above the ribcage can easily
puncture the heart and cause massive damage to the heart and incur death
from loss of blood in about 14 minutes.
Sliding the spoke between the bone of the knee and the kneecap can cause
quite a bit of damage and keep them off that leg for quite a while, as well
as cause severe joint pains for the rest of their lives.
Sliding the bicycle spoke under the shoulderblade and out the other
side(moving up to down) can damage several muscle groups quite easily with
little effort.
The rest is up to you. ____________________ Make way for the bad guy! |
|
Psychopixi
Fanatic Posts: 376 Registered: 31/12/1969 Status: Offline
|
posted on 6/7/2002 at 09:51 AM |
Comedian: Wow. I donīt know if I want to ask how you know all of that!
Remind me never to piss you off, mmkay?
Bettie: Donīt even talk to me about mood disorders!! :roll: ____________________ Do not fear death so much, but rather the inadequate life. |
|
darkness_of_shadows
Occasional Poster Posts: 49 Registered: 9/6/2002 Status: Offline
|
posted on 7/7/2002 at 12:18 AM |
comedian.. ill have to remember that.. THANKS (may come in
VEEEERRRRRYYYY useful *evil eyes everyone within 5 feet...*
beware muahahahaha
sorry.. im ok ____________________ if you want idiocy you've come to the right place |
|
Comedian
Fanatic Posts: 213 Registered: 31/12/1969 Status: Offline
|
posted on 7/7/2002 at 05:59 AM |
I am not an angry of virulent man, for both of those methods employ sloppy,
almost haphazard standards. I am a professional man.
The part I forgot about the shoulder blade is that it makes it real hell to
throw a punch of write for quite a while. People whom you do this to on
the non-dominant may never recover simply because they refrain from using
the muscle groups.
Also, you can tear off the upper eyelid with very little work, which
neither damages the cornea or any of the eye, so it remains in tact and
fucntional, but can prove to be an annoyance for them cleaning eyepatches,
rubbing eyes with wet handkerchiefs, etc.
Also, sliding the spoke along just under the skin from the area of skin
between the big toe and smaller toe up to the ankle can create severe
walking and running pains almost indefinitely. ____________________ Make way for the bad guy! |
|
darkness_of_shadows
Occasional Poster Posts: 49 Registered: 9/6/2002 Status: Offline
|
posted on 7/7/2002 at 04:47 PM |
ok comedian.. NOW your scaring me.. ____________________ if you want idiocy you've come to the right place |
|
Dolorosa
Extreme Fanatic Posts: 856 Registered: 31/12/1969 Status: Offline
|
posted on 7/7/2002 at 05:47 PM |
Tearing someone apart literally, isnīt really all that difficult, you just
have to know where to hit, right Comedian?
As for martial arts, the two I offer up are basic Jeet Kun Do, which is a
serious ass-kicker when you do it right, and of all things...fencing.
I fenced for a little over three years...you can do a remarkable amount of
damage with a sharpened straw.
And running away, is never...ever...an option.
Sometimes pride is all we have. ____________________ In the valley of the Goats, the Goat Fucker is King |
|
Comedian
Fanatic Posts: 213 Registered: 31/12/1969 Status: Offline
|
posted on 7/7/2002 at 07:19 PM |
The right tools make any job easy, and as Machivelli said, cripple your
opponents indefinitely or they will come back to haunt you. An incomplete
job is the worst kind.
I personally like sliding the spoke between each knuckle joint in a hand,
it makes it so they can barely make a fist without feeling severe pain.
Strike first and hardest, or strike second and kill/cripple. ____________________ Make way for the bad guy! |
|