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Author: Subject: worst sick stories

Fanatic





Posts: 248
Registered: 31/12/1969
Status: Offline

  posted on 13/4/2002 at 11:50 PM
Yes I know all of you have them. A story in which you were really sick and that moment is stuck in your memory. whether it is getting plastered the night before and waking up all hangover is and throwing up everywhere or a stomach virus thing I want to know what is your worst or funnies story.
<BR>
<BR>I will tell you mine. Its kinda funny but kinda wasnt at the time but now it is.
<BR>
<BR>My friend lawrie-Beth and Corey went out to eat at this steak house that lawrie works at. Well we really didnīt go to eat we just hung out with all the people that work there cause they are cool and we got a blooming onion and we all ate that. Well I was slowly not feeling good so we hopped in the car and started for home. Lawrie was in the front and Corey and I were in the Back seat talking and stuff and all of a sudden I kinda felt the sudden urge to throw up hit me and Corey looks at me and says "dude are you ok" and I was like uhm no I think Iīm gonna get sick and Lawrie goes "Well at least roll down a window dude" So i did and we were almost home anyways going 45 down a back road with a car behind us.
<BR>
<BR>So I am like oh shyt and just kinda yawn in technicolor out her window and watch it hit the car behind us and roll down the side of her window and car and Corey is behind me laughing and Lawrie is like OMG want me to pull over? So she pulls over in front of a church of all places and there I am barfing in the front yard of the church and corey yells "see what church does to people" i kinda laugh and go back to what I was going and coreyīs rubbing my back and makes sure Iīm not dieing and we get back in the car and he hops up in the front seat cause he hates throw up.
<BR>
<BR>We get back to my house and I was feeling lots better and I had to hose down her car. And that was really funny. Kinda gross but really funny. So i get home and tell my mom and take a bath and stuff and go to bed
<BR>
<BR>Start feeling sick again and I pray to the porcelin gods for the rest of the night. crying on the floor cause I didnīt have nothing else in my stomach any more and cuase I hate yawning in technicolor cause I always feel so vulnerable and still cry for mommie.
<BR>
<BR>Ended up I caught a stomach virus from my boss at work and was out of skool for 2 days while mommie pamperd me and took care of me. undefined
<BR>
<BR>I dunno I find it really funny now......Its kinda gross but I gues Iīm just twisted like that.......tell me your stories!

 

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Administrator




Posts: 317
Registered: 31/12/1969
Status: Online

  posted on 14/4/2002 at 12:32 AM
I think I was bout 21. Iīd just moved out of the guest house at my dadīs place, and hadnīt gotten my own place yet, so I was staying in a tent and at friendīs houses. Iīd just spent the nite at my fuckbuddyīs house, and woke up with a really really bad fever. I couldnīt even stand up, and didnīt really have any place to go. She was still living with her mom, who I didnīt know all that well (and who wasnīt too sure about me sleeping with her underage daughter), but she went and got her. Mom took my temperature, and freaked - got me some ice packs and stuff and said I wasnīt going anywhere. (Not that I could have). She told me to go back to sleep, and I was happy to. I slept for about 30 hours, and finally woke up and started singing. Mom came in and asked me if I wanted some food. I said yea, so she made me some eggs and stuff and came back in and asked how I was feeling. I said I was fine. She said I didnīt look fine. I said "Iīm fine, Iīm gonna go play football in a little while". She was like "Oh shit," and took my temperature again. It was something rediculous and dangerous, and she freaked again and got me some more ice. We sat there and talked about football, and cheerleaders for a while and were laughing our asses off - me because I thought I had been wasting my time with the music thing when I should have been a football player - and her because I was so clearly out of my mind. We might have talked for a few hours, or maybe a few minutes, but we were extremely entertained. I think I laughed so hard I passed out for another day or 2. When I woke up I was feeling better, and told Mom about my weird dream about football, and she said it wasnīt a dream. Sheīs been my adopted mom ever since, and has always encouraged me to spend plenty of time in her daughterīs room.

 

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Fanatic




Posts: 248
Registered: 31/12/1969
Status: Offline

  posted on 15/4/2002 at 05:51 PM
OMG thats just great...at least you bonded lol I wish I could sleep 30 hours though that would be awesome. At least her mom was cool about it though
OH COME ON GUYS DONīT TELL ME YOU DONT HAVE SICK STORIES I KNOW YOU DOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :eek:

 

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My Life is like a porno-Without the sex-Just the weird music

 

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Posts: 114
Registered: 31/12/1969
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  posted on 16/4/2002 at 11:13 PM
I donīt know how exciting this is, but when I think back, the time I was the most sick went something like this.
it was December 25th, I had moved out of my moms house and into a boarding house earlier that day, so my bf at the time and I went out to celebrate at this goth club (it has burned down since :cry: ) So we drove to the place (an hour away) He was slipping me drinks (I was underage) After my fourth double shot of vodka and oj (I have nooo alcohol tolerance) I was pretty freaking gone, I kept leaving him to go talk to random people that looked cool and were almost as drunk as I was. I kind of realized it was time to go when I found myself in the bathroom and I was trying to put on eyeliner (which I can do in the dark, without a mirror driving the car while talking on the phone, eating a meal (which I frequently do in the car) tuning the radio and singing along, oh and driving to) anyway, so I realize that I canīt get my hand to my eye, cause it wonīt stop moving (my hand, my eye, the mirror, they were all swirling) So I go grab my bf (more like he grabbed me) and we go to leave, we get to the stairs and I manage to fall all the way down them (damn platform heels) and I am so drunk I am just giggling wildly, then I look up and who is standing there but the owner of the club, a friend of a friend, and that is why I think he didnīt ban me when he clearly saw the underage stamp on my hand. I thought the whole thing was a riot, until we were in the car, cars and drunks donīt get along well, and I made my bf drive home with all four windows down doing 65 in the middle of winter apparently stripping my clothes off (or trying to) the whole time (mind you this was an hour long car ride) That was the fun part. I donīt remember much afterward, but I apparently managed to get us into my house without to many problems, because that is where I found myself lying several hours later, actually I found myself lying next to the toilet puking my guts out with my bf standing outside the door trying to explain to my new housemates and landlord what was taking me so long ("I think she had some bad chinese food.")You can be sure I remember the next few HOURS spent with my head in the toilet (which was none to clean) making deals with myself "Iīll never drink again" and yelling "Iīll be right there!" through my retches at the door every five minutes because someone would come and try to beat the door down. OK not very interesting I know, but I thought I was going to die, I didnīt feel normal for days afterwords. I did have a hell of a lot of fun though...
I donīt usually do things like that anymore, I am getting to old (I will actually be LEGAL to drink soon! :) )

 

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Posts: 116
Registered: 14/4/2002
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  posted on 17/4/2002 at 08:55 AM
Letīs see... I did the yawning out of the car thing once, Rogue and I were at a club, and he was getting really strong drinks at the bar, because the bartender was crushing on him... a shot of something would end up being about 3 shots in one of those little plastic cups... anyway I had one firewater, two jagermeisters, and a sex on the beach... it was way too much for my poor little tummy to handle... on the way home, I rolled down the window and got happy all over the road... then we got home and had lots of drunken, violent sex...

Then there was the time (donīt know if this counts as being sick or not) that me and some friends were over at a friendīs farm, and we went into the hayloft and were playing flashlight hide and seek, and I ran right off the edge and struck a rafter so hard I was flung back up into the hayloft... I thought Iīd killed myself... I had only broken two ribs... I donīt tend to get sick all that much... germs die as soon as they hit my system...

 

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Registered: 31/12/1969
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  posted on 17/4/2002 at 07:12 PM
Heh heh I think Iīve heard the hayloft story before..

 

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Posts: 48
Registered: 31/12/1969
Status: Offline

  posted on 17/4/2002 at 10:25 PM
I wasnīt going to write this because it happens to be both my funniest sick/drunk story and my MOST embarrassing drunk story. I was 18 at the time and had just finished basic training for the navy and sent to "A" school. Now mind you, I had been under lock and key for about 2 months during basic and found myself in a new strange city without a leash.

I went out on the town with a room-mate and we ended up at a bar. The bartender flirted with us and gave us free drinks all that evening (I think he thought he was going to take us both home with him, why else would he do that). We ended up getting pleasantly smashed and leaving with two guys we knew from base.

We caught a cab and returned to base. Obviously we werenīt thinking too clearly because at the school on base females werenīt allowed into the male areas and vice versa. My room-mate decided to go her own way with one of the guys. I ended up making out in the "barracks duty van" with the other.

I made him stop when I heard quiet laughing and snickering. I opened my eyes and sat up to discover about 15 guys peering in the van windows watching us. Turns out that they had been inside watching a porno when someone came in and told them that there was a real one going on out in the parking lot.

We left. We found out that there was a party going on at a hotel only a few miles away. We caught a cab. To make this long story short, I ended up sick as a dog the next morning (puking all over myself, my bed, the toilet, the shower, ...) and back at the barracks. I donīt remember a whole lot of what happened at the hotel, except drinking ALOT. When I went to take a shower, I discovered that someone had stuck sesame street stickers all over my body. I had bert and ernie on my breasts, oscar the grouch and big bird on my ass, and kermit the frog between my legs. Needless to say, I learned my lesson and have never been that drunk again.

 

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Posts: 114
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  posted on 17/4/2002 at 11:31 PM
omg, that has got to be one of the funniest things I have ever heard, so which was worse, the fact that someone defiled you while you were drunk and you didnīt know, or the fact that they defiled you with sesame street stickers? lmfao!

 

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this is your world in which we grow and we will grow to hate you

 

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Posts: 248
Registered: 31/12/1969
Status: Offline

  posted on 18/4/2002 at 06:49 AM
omg thats great hehe...Seasame street stickers whoīd have thought.....

The only time I have ever gotten sick from drinking was a while back when A friend of mine down the street had her uncle move in with her family and he owned at tattoo gun and what not well he gave me a tattoo for free and the next week we celebrated (Note I am totally under age) and So he went out and bought all kinds of stuff and I drank some aftershock and that was about it just cause thats my favorite well I had to walk home and play straight...So I sit down to eat dinner and there is a glass of milk sitting in front of me and i was thirsty and without even thinking i downed the whole glass.....needless to say in like 30 minutes that milk so didnīt agree with my tummy.... When they say milk and alchohol donīt mix they are so right...I had to go to skool the next day all sick and what not and trying to run the mile! it was aweful....I felt like shyt and I swore never to drink agian but That was something i never kept...LoL

so word of advise DONīT drink milk after drinking alchohol

 

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Posts: 115
Registered: 31/12/1969
Status: Offline

  posted on 18/4/2002 at 08:33 PM
Does food poisoning count? Imagine getting sick all night on bad fish (letīs just say Iīm glad I had not eaten much of it) starting 12 hours before my brotherīs wedding (which I was in, of course). Then riding around with him and his yuppie pig groomsmen in a limo while theyīre all getting shit faced before the ceremony (can you say "tacky?" I thought you could) trying not to puke. Then the best man starts making fun of me because I was not wearing over-priced Pierre Cardin socks ro something. Then all through the rather long ceremony almost puking on the altar a few times.

Or maybe the halloween party (the one where I dressed up as the alley cat) where I had momentarily forgotten that jello shots and 151 and goldschlager do not mix well (esp on an empty stomach), then was forcibly reminded as my hiccups turned into...well, letīs just say I was bent over the rail on the back porch for about an hour or so while the party went on around me.... That was fun.

 

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  posted on 24/4/2002 at 10:38 PM
hmmm...most of my stories are too much booze stories, but I do remember getting very very ill in my junior year in highschool. I woke up in the middle of the night with an abdomen the size of a basketball and spent the night throwing up soooo loudly it woke my mom who sat while I hurled my guts out for hours. When I stopped barfing she took my temp which read at 104. Pretty much my body cooked itself into a sort of coma...I remember very little other than not being able to walk or open my eyes, and that I was missing my finals at school. When my temp dropped down to 100 she ventured to take me to a clinic, where in the 20 min I spent in the waiting room my temp skyrocketed back up to 104. I was given anti nausea pills (which I couldnīt keep down) and antibiotics which were a derivative of penicillin, tho mom and I told them Iīm allergic. SO now Iīve got a temp of 104 again, canīt keep the nausea pills down, AND Iīve got a nice full body rash from the antibiotics. PLUS she put my cat tootsie to sleep when I was unconscious on the couch for a few days īcause he peed on the wall again.
The only plus to it was when I got back to school, I had cooked/puked off 15 lbs (fat girlsī HEAVEN, let me tell you) in a week and a half and looked like a frigginī zombie...pale, weak, haggard....and all my teachers felt so bad they let me off easy on finals since I did well all year.
THEN there was my 21st birthday...and the mystery of the wet bathmat....the colorless, odorless wet bathmat by the toilet. still canīt figure out if my dog peed on it, if MICHAEL peed on it, if *I* peed on it or if I puked on it (since I remember puking straight vodka all night it would be odorless and colorless) so we just said "forget it" and tossed it in the washer.

 

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  posted on 25/4/2002 at 03:46 AM
The sickest Iīve ever been was back when I was attending Bible School. We had a big church convention, with people from all over the country, and, of course, the flu started striking us all down. Including me. I started feeling sick the last meeting of the day, but didnīt get really ill until everyone else had gone to bed.

Stoic that I was, I didnīt want to wake anyone up. So I dragged myself across the hall to the bathroom, puking what must have been at least a dozen times, and cleaning up my own messes when I missed the toilet. Then dragging myself back to bed, where I would groan under my breath so as not to wake up the people in the dorm. I was horribly thirsty, but I couldnīt even keep water down. I didnīt sleep at all that night.

I felt better the next morning, but I had lost 5 pounds overnight and couldnīt walk without hanging on to stuff. Unfortunately, I was scheduled to ride home to my parents house that day, some 8 or 9 hours away. Needless to say, the trip was exhausting.

Also unfortunately, I gained back the 5 pounds once I got some fluids back in me. :cry:

 

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Posts: 116
Registered: 14/4/2002
Status: Offline

  posted on 25/4/2002 at 12:42 PM
Ever heard of Paul Young, the folk rock legend? I was sick on his shoes then rolled under a car and dry wretched for 3 hours.

 

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  posted on 25/4/2002 at 05:43 PM
ewwwies...I just hate puking...I hate feeling voulnderable...But I dunno I find sick stories funn after they happen....cause we always talk about that kind of stuff either in German class (where my teacher tells about getting food poisoning in Sweeden when he got married) or at lunch...But go figure all the people I eat lunch with are bois....

 

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  posted on 30/4/2002 at 12:50 PM
Alright, so there I was, just sitting at the bus stop, organizing my jellybeans into nice little color-coded sandwich baggies. And then out of nowehere, this guy walks by, and HE LOOKS AT ME. And all of a sudden I can hear him thinking, "What a frigginī weirdo, with his jellybeans, damn...people like him are a failure to everything, I bet you he masturbates to midget porn and wears saftey pins through his naughty hooty-hoos." So I stand up and I yell at him, nothing specific, just yelling...and he gets this look in his eye, like "Oh shit, this kid can read my mind." So he runs, and I chase him...īcause if my mindreading secret is out, those little magic hamster-thingies will come after me again...anyways, Iīm chasing him, and God tells me to take a hard left...which makes me run into a telephone pole (Further proof god sucks) and the guy gets a little more ahead. THEN he turns into this alleyway...so I chase him in there, yelling at him. And heīs crying, īcause you know I know what he knows. AND THEN! It turns into a dead end. Yeah, I had him...he started yelling at me to leave him alone, and not to take his money or anything...and then he told me about his kids and stuff, and I realized, hey, this guy is great...heīs so great, heīs the type to go to heaven. And then I think, whoah...heaven is a far far better place than this place, cause all the jellybeans are color coded already. So I tell him, Iīm going to send him to heaven cause itīs so nice up there. And he starts crying. Well, I decided to make it pretty quick, but all I had was some jellybeans and three scalpels I found on the ground. It took me like three hours, but seemed a lot faster after I found the brick and the dead rat. Finally I got him up into heaven...yeah...I bet heīs pretty grateful up there. It made me feel pretty good.
Or were you talking about the OTHER type of sick?
:-D

 

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  posted on 30/4/2002 at 01:04 PM
Dolorosa>> Absolutely hilarious!!! :lol:

 

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  posted on 1/5/2002 at 05:18 AM
Heh heh...hells yeah. :grin:

 

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Registered: 14/4/2002
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  posted on 2/5/2002 at 06:27 AM
lmao that is great! hehe I needed that laugh today but OMG that was just great! hehe ---any kind of sick you like hehe :-D

 

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  posted on 2/5/2002 at 06:33 AM
Uh that was me up there ^^^^^ i totally forgot that I didnt sign in! :evil:

 

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Posts: 104
Registered: 31/12/1969
Status: Offline

  posted on 4/5/2002 at 05:15 PM
Dolorosa- *LMAO* :lol:


Oh my... well... I wouldnīt say I have any fun sick stories... but I kinda have alot of the only sick stories. More then one bad, so itīs hard to choose.

When I were born, I almost died... not only because I were one month ahead, but because they had troubles getting me out...

When I were 2 years old, I went to the hospital and had to take alot of tests that are really scary for such a young child since they thought I had some liver disease... they even wanted to take a piece of my liver *big time yuck* But my parents wouldnīt let em.

When I were 4 (I donīt know if this counts as a sick storie though), I got a book shelf over me... hrm...

When I were 5 I almost died since I got a major astmatic attack. My mom were severly sick, so it triggered it. My dad took me to the local hospital, but they said it were nothing... but since he were convinced it were worse than īnothingī (maybe that I couldnīt breath at all were a hint), he took me to another hospital a bit away where they in panic helped me since it were an emergency.

And, um, other stories like that. One time (another not-sick storie), I opened the car while it were still moving, when we were going to park the car... since I were like 6 or 7 years old, I didnīt know better, and I fell out of the moving car. If I wouldnīt have such a firm grip at the door I would have been... um... let me say it delicatly... splashed all over the parking lot *lol* Guess Iīm not Godīs favourite human... or maybe Iīm his favourite toy... either way, itīs kind of amusing when I look back at it. Nothing that really bothers me. Iīm still here, this far, so mwahhahahaha *cough* :-o

 

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