feralucce
Extreme Fanatic   Posts: 1810 Registered: 31/12/1969 Status: Offline
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posted on 18/1/2007 at 04:03 PM |
This is my query letter...
______________________________
After reading the list of genres you have represented, I am impressed by
the wide array of them, and the broad rage of topics. I recently completed
my first novel and believe I am ready for representation. Your esoteric
collection of published books appeals to me a great deal.
My 79,000 word novel “Memoirs of an Unremarkable Man” is a first person
narrative of the history of the universe from the standpoint of a deity. It
starts with the creation of the universe and moves through the deity's
exploration of self and the nature of creation; and on through his life and
into modern times; ending during the tragedy of Hurricane Katrina.
Oce the universe and man are created, things go wrong. The nature of the
universe is such that the presence of light necessitates the existence of
darkness. This darkness results in a corruption of the whole of creation,
manifesting in different ways depending on culture, location and beliefs.
The divine is plagued by a driving need to fix this rend in the fabric of
reality. Eventually, the divine comes face to face with the root of the
corruption, Lucifer. Lucifer and he become fast friends and work through
the rest of eternity as companions. With Lucifer's insight, the divine has
hope for creation.
Would you like to see a few sample chapters or a manuscript? I am new to
writing novels, but; I have been telling stories via role-playing games for
well over 20 years. While the tradition of role-playing is an oral one,
rather than a written one, the mechanics of a good story transcend genre. I
feel that I am ready for representation as I have finished one novel and
have started drafting another.
Thank you for your consideration and time.
____________________________________
The Following is the response...
_____________________________________
this sounds like it had the potential to be interesting, despite the myriad
other books with similar premises, but unfortunately, it seems to quickly
lose its irony when it gets into all that divine and deity and lucifer
nonsense. religion doesn't equal literature. in fact, it's the opposite of
literature. and when it tries to pass itself off as literature, it is
invariably the worst kind of literature. role-playing games are not
literature.
with that said, i think spending a few years revising (and by revising i
don't mean running spell check) might turn this into a work a professional
might want to consider, so you need not give up on it entirely. (you may
decide you want to later, which is perfectly acceptable, too.) you
defintiely need to set it aside and stop querying (and from the looks of
it, i'm not the only agent to receive your form-letter q) at once. as it
stands, i'm guessing it's far from being ready to be shopped around to
agents, much less editors. you don't want to embarrass yourself any more
than you have to.
you may want to dismiss my response, but your "first novel" and "new to
writing novels" status doesn't do much to argue against such an assessment.
this isn't ready. you're not ready. you need to start over. and this time
more humbly. i suggest starting with reading books--serious ones--and maybe
taking some of your early drafts to a local writing group or junior college
workshop. maybe by the second or third manuscript, we can chat again?
best,
-------------------------------------------
What an arrogant piece of shit... he's not even seen a sample chapter
____________________
The earth turns on a tilted axis - just doing the best it can.
Hohenheim of Light~Full Metal Alchemist
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Domkitten
Fanatic   Posts: 470 Registered: 23/9/2002 Status: Offline
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posted on 18/1/2007 at 05:29 PM |
| So this is a publisher and he doesn't know how to use capital letters and
punctuation? And he thinks you have problems? ____________________
It's like kegel exercises for your throat.~Monolycus
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feralucce
Extreme Fanatic Posts: 1810 Registered: 31/12/1969 Status: Offline
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posted on 18/1/2007 at 05:32 PM |
| he's an agent... ____________________
The earth turns on a tilted axis - just doing the best it can.
Hohenheim of Light~Full Metal Alchemist
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Schizo
Extreme Fanatic  Posts: 897 Registered: 31/12/1969 Status: Offline
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posted on 18/1/2007 at 05:48 PM |
fucker... he needs to start over... and more humbly, too... *mutters
incoherently...*
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Rogue
Member   Posts: 199 Registered: 31/12/1969 Status: Offline
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posted on 18/1/2007 at 05:59 PM |
Hi dood,
yer buk was hard 2 reed and i spilt my MGD wen I saw teh funnay part.
plz try 2 rite mor, and to warn me b4 u say anythng funnay like poopy or
saskatchewan. kthxbye.
-bigtime publisher guy and stuff, heywood jablowme ____________________
Plenty of time, my sweet. Plenty of time.
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Xel_Pillik
Occasional Poster   Posts: 20 Registered: 2/3/2006 Status: Offline
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posted on 18/1/2007 at 06:04 PM |
| What an ass ____________________
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ComteStGermain
Occasional Poster  Posts: 21 Registered: 13/6/2002 Status: Offline
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posted on 18/1/2007 at 06:11 PM |
Yes, but then again anyone who has been here for more than a few
nanoseconds knows to expect that sort of thing from our venerable Rogue.
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Schizo
Extreme Fanatic Posts: 897 Registered: 31/12/1969 Status: Offline
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posted on 18/1/2007 at 06:24 PM |
What Feral hasn't told you is... soon after posting this rant... he
recieved his first positive reply asking for his first two chapters...
Now I want everyone to just pour themselves into wishing goodwill on this
for Feral... let's rally as friends around him... selling a book is a very
painful process... it is easy to feel very wounded by rejections... and the
closer you get to acceptance, the sharper the blow is when you get turned
down...
Best of luck, Feral... I believe in you and your book... *hugs*
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feralucce
Extreme Fanatic Posts: 1810 Registered: 31/12/1969 Status: Offline
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posted on 18/1/2007 at 06:25 PM |
| WHAT? rogue was making a supporting statement... what are we supposed to
expect from a respected member of this community? ____________________
The earth turns on a tilted axis - just doing the best it can.
Hohenheim of Light~Full Metal Alchemist
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Rogue
Member Posts: 199 Registered: 31/12/1969 Status: Offline
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posted on 18/1/2007 at 06:27 PM |
| Respected? You must have the wrong guy. ;-) Seriously, loads of positive
energies coming your way, and put me down for a few dozen copies on
preorder on Amazon. ____________________
Plenty of time, my sweet. Plenty of time.
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Xel_Pillik
Occasional Poster Posts: 20 Registered: 2/3/2006 Status: Offline
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posted on 18/1/2007 at 06:33 PM |
* forehead smack*
my comment wasn't directed at Rogue. sorry I should have clarified.
*sends lots of positive engeries to Feral* ____________________
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feralucce
Extreme Fanatic Posts: 1810 Registered: 31/12/1969 Status: Offline
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posted on 18/1/2007 at 06:44 PM |
To clarify...
ComteStGermain: rogue is a respected member of the community... shush...
Rogue: yes, respected... erm...ok... not respected, but an honored member ____________________
The earth turns on a tilted axis - just doing the best it can.
/>
Hohenheim of Light~Full Metal Alchemist
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Rogue
Member Posts: 199 Registered: 31/12/1969 Status: Offline
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posted on 18/1/2007 at 06:47 PM |
| Thanks for the clarification, Hombre Grande. I don't wear respect well, I
look much better in a fear and loathing. ____________________
Plenty of time, my sweet. Plenty of time.
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feralucce
Extreme Fanatic Posts: 1810 Registered: 31/12/1969 Status: Offline
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posted on 18/1/2007 at 06:50 PM |
| rogue... you are my friend... and that takes a special kind of person ____________________
The earth turns on a tilted axis - just doing the best it can.
/>
/>
Hohenheim of Light~Full Metal Alchemist
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feralucce
Extreme Fanatic Posts: 1810 Registered: 31/12/1969 Status: Offline
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posted on 18/1/2007 at 06:51 PM |
As Schiz wanted me to post... This just arrived in the email
"Please send chapter one and two, single spaced not via attachment.
Thank you.
BB for ES Agency" ____________________
The earth turns on a tilted axis - just doing the best it can.
/>
/>
/>
Hohenheim of Light~Full Metal Alchemist
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Rogue
Member Posts: 199 Registered: 31/12/1969 Status: Offline
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posted on 18/1/2007 at 06:59 PM |
| Danke Feral, and much luck on the publishing. We're all rooting for you. ____________________
Plenty of time, my sweet. Plenty of time.
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Starlight
Extreme Fanatic  Posts: 618 Registered: 27/9/2002 Status: Offline
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posted on 18/1/2007 at 10:14 PM |
| Sending some good vibes your way, Feral. Best of luck with the novel. ____________________
"When choosing between two evils, I always like to try the one I've never
tried before." ~Mae West
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Psychopixi
Fanatic  Posts: 376 Registered: 31/12/1969 Status: Offline
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posted on 19/1/2007 at 03:49 AM |
Good luck!!
As for the arsehole agent, at least you know quick and upfront that that
isn't the sort of agency you want to be dealing with. I mean, even if
you're going to say no, you should at least do it in a more professional
manner. ____________________
Do not fear death so much, but rather the inadequate life.
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feralucce
Extreme Fanatic Posts: 1810 Registered: 31/12/1969 Status: Offline
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posted on 19/1/2007 at 08:15 PM |
yeah... this whole experience is making me physically ill... I am sooo
nervous...
____________________
The earth turns on a tilted axis - just doing the best it can.
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/>
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Hohenheim of Light~Full Metal Alchemist
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Schizo
Extreme Fanatic Posts: 897 Registered: 31/12/1969 Status: Offline
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posted on 19/1/2007 at 08:27 PM |
*hugs* we're all standing behind you, Feral...
and if you are not feeling well, may I play nurse? ____________________
"You can tell by the scars on my arms and the cracks in my hips and the
dents in my car and the blisters on my lips that I'm not the carefullest of
girls." - Dresden Dolls, "Girl Anachronism"
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