ALONE I STAND
as i stand alone in my dreams
to look at ur face is heaven to me
for the way u left me pains me so
as the consuming thoughts go on in my mind
for i wish i had u here by my side again
for i live life alone in side
i thought i would have forever
but with out u it feels like a nightmare
alone i stand with life
where was the pain when left me
is this a crime that i have done
where will the happiness go for now u are gone
for me u was everything
to u it seem like neediness things
but the thoughts of u haunted me
with no way to stop them
can i see u again
will u stand here with me
could this be a life alone
or is this some kind of test
for my love for u will always be true
the darkness in my heart grows strong
for me wanting to live is fading
can i find some way from this pain
for i stand alone in the dark
____________________ for in the darkness of the shadows gives me power
· What do you have against poetry and vampire stories?
Nothing, We love poetry and vampire stories. But we hate bad poetry and bad
vampire stories. It got to the point where all we were getting was bad
teen-angst poetry and bad vampire stories, and people were getting pissed
at us for not posting it on the site. Your poetry may be good and your
vampire stories might be good, but we don't want to be the ones to decide
whether it is or isn't. It's easier just to make a "No Poetry or Vampire
stories" rule. There's plenty of other places on the net to post your
words.
____________________ "When choosing between two evils, I always like to try the one I've
never
tried before." ~Mae West
Schizo
Extreme Fanatic
Posts: 897 Registered: 31/12/1969 Status: Offline
posted on 4/2/2005 at 04:04 AM
I'm sorry, but I love this poem.
Lines like these can only be deemed immortal, on a par with Shakespeare:
quote:for me u was everything
to u it seem like neediness things
*swoon*
____________________ "You can tell by the scars on my arms and the cracks in my hips and the
dents in my car and the blisters on my lips that I'm not the carefullest of
girls." - Dresden Dolls, "Girl Anachronism"
the imagery is what is disturbing here... my rats have better erudition
____________________ The earth turns on a tilted axis - just doing the best it can.
Hohenheim of Light~Full Metal Alchemist
dead-cell
Fanatic
Posts: 344 Registered: 31/12/1969 Status: Offline
posted on 4/2/2005 at 06:14 PM
I'm usually nice to newbies, but....
First off:
Goth + Ninja= what.... quantum singuality black?
Second:
I'm not even sure if engrish.com would except this "poem."
Third:
I will use encouraging chants for this individual to leap.
____________________ co-worker: "Your gay!?"
myself: "Didn't you see my rainbow pin?"
co-worker: "I just thought you liked skettles."
-(yes, it actually happened to me)
W0rmW00d
Fanatic
Posts: 355 Registered: 5/8/2004 Status: Offline
posted on 5/2/2005 at 02:54 AM
I think that you are all being very harsh to the poor blighter. It is
quite clearly a post-modern take of the introspective-love poem so beloved
of the gothic and romantic writers so venerated by so many.
Note the use of 'txt spk' to illustrate the modern inability to type
out whole words, for example the use of 'u' in place of the now archaic
spelling 'you'.
Take heed of the lack of both capitalisation and punctuation, clearly
mocking the current trend towards formless writing, due to the
proliferation of internet chatrooms and the need for speed-typing which
precludes such niceties.
The lack of both a regular metre and rhyme scheme eschews poetic
conventions and harks back to such works as Byron's 'Darkness' so a look
forward into the chaotic view of a dystopian future and a look back at our
poetic heritage are both masterfully interwoven.
The lack of any real imagery or metaphor is a very postmodern touch
which I particularly admire. It has been the case more and more with
usccesful poets of recent years (just look at the works of our own beloved
poet laureate) that a more literal take on life is sought through poetry
and the days of involved conceits are dying fast. This is expertly
represented by the sole, basic repeated theme of 'dreams' and 'nightmares'.
Such simplistic images are a stirling example of our author's ironic
bent.
The final, and I feel triumphant, conceit of the poem is the total and
utter lack of any apparent talent. In a day and age in which
Intellectualism is frowned upon and entertainment usually involves 'people
off the street acting naturally' therefore displaying no talents, where
hack novels are as awaited as classics and Vocal eq and compression as
laudable as a real singing voices, Gothic Ninja takes us to a whole new
level. The level of the talentless artist. Where all other forms of
entertainment are populated with 'real life' people Gothic Ninja has
though, 'Why not the poetic arts also?' The impression is given of any old
Tom, Dick or Stanley sitting at their computer, typing away feelings which
they apparently have no way to fully express. Therein lies the genius of
this poet.
I look forwards, with much anticipation, to the next submission, thus
justifying the plural of the thread title.
Or I may be reading a little too much into this?
____________________ Eritis sicut Deus scientes bonum et malum.
And the third angel sounded, and a troll army did descend upon the world.
KittyGoesMrow
Fanatic
Posts: 218 Registered: 30/4/2003 Status: Offline
posted on 5/2/2005 at 11:59 AM
Geez. Be more creative when trying to skirt around the no poetry rule. For
example.
WormWood: youknowwhat? I don't really give a flying rat fuck what you
think, especially in this instance... go fuck yourself... uit trying to
tell us how we should act... quit trying to define what shmeng is and
should be... quit being a pretentious fuckwad... I am sick and tired of you
second guessing every reaction on this board, especially when you have not
earned the respect required for such an action...
THIS PLACE HAS FUCKING RULES... and if the fuckmonkey isn't even bright
enough to read them before going of and posting such a piece of abysmass
drooling drivel, he deservesthe bashing he gets, plain and simple... this
community has zero tolerance for zero intelligence... READ THAT PIECE OF
SHIT and you will see that we are acting within our particular idiom... and
by telling usto be kinder and gentler to someone in desperate need of a
head swap operation, you place yourself in the same fucking category... If
you want to mediate, apply with the UN or your local police or even as
aunion rep, buttake ten steps back, you're standing on my cock, and if you
are that close, I better be getting blown...
So... in closing, fuck you - you sanctimonious, self-righteous, and
pretentious lackluster fuckwit...
P.S. you may be joking on this index, but go ahead and apply this to any
time you have reprimanded me for my attitude.. it all fits...
____________________ The earth turns on a tilted axis - just doing the best it can.
Hohenheim of Light~Full Metal Alchemist
Meranda_Jade
Fanatic
Posts: 511 Registered: 31/12/1969 Status: Offline
posted on 6/2/2005 at 09:14 AM
geez, feral... I thought that Wormwood was sorta joining in on the bashing,
using wit and sarcasm instead of name-calling and vulgarity. I saw no
attempt to tell others what to do, including you. What crawled up your ass
and died? I mean, I know you don't like the guy, but he really wasn't doing
anything out of line, there. Let's be fair. If everyone else can bash the
newbie, I see no reason for certain people to be excluded on the basis that
they were annoying when they first arrived. Besides, it's getting to the
point where I can hardly tell the trolls from the regulars anymore.
Everyone seems to be really snarky these days. It's a shame, really. We've
all gone through a recent mass loss of intelligence, and have reverted to
high-school mentality. There's no difference between Wormwood making crass
comments and you tearing people a new asshole. It's all the same shmeng.
____________________
Monolycus
Fanatic
Posts: 580 Registered: 31/12/1969 Status: Offline
posted on 6/2/2005 at 09:35 AM
There's no difference between the approach Schiz took and the approach
W0rmW00d took in mocking GothicNinja except in length. I am completely in
agreement with M_J about the mass drop in intelligence here lately, except
I'll raise it. You chase off intelligent contributions just as or more
quickly than you chase off stupidity. It's not even a guilty pleasure to
read this page anymore, it's just guilty.
If I ever get a hankering to listen endlessly about fashion, which boys are
gorgeous, who wants to sleep with whom, hear moronic two-dimensional
observations of current events and the state of high schools these days,
listen to diatribes about how one member's imbecilic blather is more
respectable than another's or check out a gallery of 70's style van art,
I'll be back.
____________________ "I believe that woman is planning to shoot me again."
KittyGoesMrow
Fanatic
Posts: 218 Registered: 30/4/2003 Status: Offline
posted on 6/2/2005 at 09:45 AM
I wasn't here at the beginning of this thing and I dont pretend to be
but... It's not hard to simply look at the websites name and know what it's
about.
But in turn if they are being dumb and not reading rules I think they need
a new asshole. I've gotten my fair share of critisizm in the past and i
believe everyone does need it in order to become a strongly placed member
in the community and to know what the people of Shmeng expect of you.
____________________ Anata ga sabishii toki, bokumo sabishii n da yo
Kira
Member
Posts: 149 Registered: 31/12/1969 Status: Offline
posted on 6/2/2005 at 04:01 PM
quote: or check out a gallery
of 70's style van art
Where did I miss this?
Seriously, I LOVE 70's style van art.
____________________ Wind me up and make me crawl to you, tie me up until I call to you.
Maybe I misinterpreted the opening... the first sentence rubbed me
completely wrong... and after being rubbed socompletely wrong for so
long... I stated what I felt...
____________________ The earth turns on a tilted axis - just doing the best it can.
/>
Hohenheim of Light~Full Metal Alchemist
W0rmW00d
Fanatic
Posts: 355 Registered: 5/8/2004 Status: Offline
posted on 6/2/2005 at 08:10 PM
Feral: Read the whole post, not just the first sentence. If I worked that
way I would have to reply to your first post with 'probably.' Instead I
read on. If you did read the whole of my post then the least you could do
is have the courtesy to address your complaint as a discussion of what I
said that was wrong rather than a string of insults. I went on to justify
my initial position through a study of the poem in question, pointing out
'what I thought was good about it' as it were. You didn't read past my
first sentence. That is frankly insulting. It could also invalidate any
flaming, insulting reply or counter-argument you have ever made. If a first
sentence drives you to reply without reading on then how do I know you ever
read posts? For fucks sake, man, how do you read newspapers? 'Nut Screws
Washer and Bolts' soundls like DIY from the headline. In fact it is about a
psychiatric patient having sex with a cleaning lady and then escaping. You
could never know if you turned away in disgust from 'yet another DIY peice
of crap'.
Of course that post was pretentious, you fucking dickwaver, it was
specifically an in depth analysis of the poem from the point of view of
someone wanting to read the good into it. Did you see how far I had to
twist? Did you read what nonsense I wrote? IT WAS FUCKING SELF DEPRECATORY
for a start, to do what I so often say not to and to place myself so open
to an attack on my analysis of the 'poem'? Think about it.
I don't tell anyone what I think that Shmeng should be. I tell you what I
think. I tell you what I see, and I tell you what I think of what I see.
When I arrived here as a brazen troll, picking a subject I knew would anger
and seeing if I could argue anyone around I was treated like this. When I
played by the rules I was treated the same, and then, when I stopped
trying, and stopped caring about the way that you like to play, well, would
you look at that. You didn't budge an inch. It seems that I will never earn
your respect, Feral, which is a shame, but I either cannot or will not help
it. We have the same bicker every time I disagree with you, or say
something that you disagee with and it is boring, because you rarely do
anything other than insult me. I have yet to see anything from you other
than 'I dont like what you say, and besides, what I am doing is customary.'
and when flaming someone you just insult them, you don't tell them what
they did wrong. You do not tell us why you insult. You say 'this is crap,
my dogs hindleg could do better and fuck anyone who thinks otherwise'. That
to me is truly lacklustre. While you don't like me, I do not dislike you,
but after being rubbed so completely wrong... I stated what I felt...
____________________ Eritis sicut Deus scientes bonum et malum.
And the third angel sounded, and a troll army did descend upon the world.