Geist
Member   Posts: 127 Registered: 5/11/2002 Status: Offline
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posted on 2/2/2003 at 03:30 AM |
Well as I'm sure a few of you have read that I will be getting out of the
military soon and I'm considering taking a road trip across our great
nation. Sorta Hunter S. Thompson like, although without all of the drugs
 A trip of
self-discovery, in search of the American dream and all that good stuff.
What I'm lookin for is maybe a little advice on places to do, things to go,
and people to see. Any suggestions ? I'll be starting out in either Los
Angeles or Seattle depending on where my tickets back to the states are
taking me so I figure that will be a good start. Prolly finish it off in
New York, or maybe head to Canada after that. Anyone think there is
something I must see or some place I must go in my quest for all things
Shmeng ?
P.S. This will also be research for a project that Devin inspired me to do.
Time for some
"Love Shmeng, Shmeng is Great" propaganda... 
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bettie_x
Extreme Fanatic   Posts: 1570 Registered: 31/12/1969 Status: Offline
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posted on 2/2/2003 at 09:45 PM |
Carlsbad Canyon...who in their right mind would pass seeing zillions of
bats fly out every night??
Other than that, just follow the road. A trip like that has no
itinerary.
Pass no smoky dive nor strip club.
Pass no possible excentric companion (unless you find being in a car trunk
at the bottom of a river unappealing)
Pass no unmarked road.
Moon a bussload of nuns.
Stop for frogs in the road.
And buy a cowboy hat. Cowboy hats are mandatory for all car trips.
I suggest you procure a very fast vehicle with no top, and a girl to
match.
Pack a camera and a recorder.
Pack a flyswatter.
And for god's sake man, dont' stop now, this here's BAT COUNTRY.
____________________
Trapped in time. Surrounded by evil. Low on gas.
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Sticupus
Fanatic   Posts: 254 Registered: 31/12/1969 Status: Offline
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posted on 2/2/2003 at 09:57 PM |
| Yeah, sounds really trite. However, if you come to Florida, you must stay
away from the fucking cities. Go to the everglades instead in a canoe. you
will see only sky and endlessness, the closest to death and being alive you
can get. ____________________
The OBOLISK is Divine.
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Monolycus
Fanatic  Posts: 580 Registered: 31/12/1969 Status: Offline
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posted on 2/2/2003 at 10:28 PM |
Looking for shmeng? Get thee to Kenosha, Wisconsin. Apart from having
three of the nation's largest porno shops right there on the state line,
Kenosha is home to Mars Cheese Castle... the largest wholesale distributor
of cheese and dairy products this great land has to offer. It will also
put you about two miles up the road from Bong State Recreational Area
(don't get your hopes up, it's not much more than a rest stop) and Zion,
Illinois which was formerly a communion for the Flat Earth Society and now
home to a defunct nuclear power plant and creepy old people who
occasionally bioluminesce.
It was not far from Kenosha that I had lunch with Elvis Presley in 1996 at
a roadside A&W stand... I would give you directions, but many of my
memories are blurred out. Here's a tip, Elvis didn't show up until I had
discovered that the camera I was packing didn't have film in it. If you
are hoping to rub elbows with a sasquatch, hitch a ride in a passing UFO or
get cozy with dead celebrities, make absolutely sure that you have already
wasted all the film in your camera by memorializing every scenic barn or
covered bridge that you pass in the first hour of your outing.
Best of luck with the Americana... and don't forget to get me a crappy
t-shirt from somewhere that nobody in their right mind would ever want to
go!
~Monolycus.
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bettie_x
Extreme Fanatic Posts: 1570 Registered: 31/12/1969 Status: Offline
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posted on 2/2/2003 at 10:35 PM |
Hey if you make it back to washington by june, you can visit a buckley
anomaly known as 'the loggers rodeo".
I'll leave the rest to your imagination. Good fun, kids, good fun. I just
go to watch and see if another logger is gonna fall off the top of the
climbing pole. That was BITCHIN.
And they sell t shirts, so you could get mono a "buckley logger's rodeo"
shirt.
I'm sure he'd love you forever. ____________________
Trapped in time. Surrounded by evil. Low on gas.
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Monolycus
Fanatic Posts: 580 Registered: 31/12/1969 Status: Offline
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posted on 2/2/2003 at 10:41 PM |
I can't promise that I'd love him forever, but I could see loving him for
two weeks pretty easily. And remember, it's better to get a t-shirt for
mono than to get mono from a t-shirt.
~M.
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Geist
Member Posts: 127 Registered: 5/11/2002 Status: Offline
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posted on 3/2/2003 at 01:01 AM |
Thank god bettie. I was almost goint to get a samoan with my car. thank you
for stopping me. lets see... cowboy hat is a must. thank god i already have
one. (yes i am from texas) thank you for the advice bettie, sounds like
you've done this before. Will definetly be going through florida, and
wisconsin is now on the agenda too. I don't know if i can handle it if mono
will only love me for 2 weeks though... *sigh* what sounds trite Stic, my
trip.... may sound trite, but how many people do you know that have
actually done this ? I may be mistaken, but I don't think too many have. at
least not anyone i know.
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Closetgothbabe
Member  Posts: 189 Registered: 31/12/1969 Status: Offline
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posted on 4/2/2003 at 05:20 PM |
You should come to Florida and we can all party our asses off and get
really wasted, then destroy some shit and yell at people. Thats always
fun!!
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Sticupus
Fanatic Posts: 254 Registered: 31/12/1969 Status: Offline
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posted on 4/2/2003 at 05:26 PM |
| Yeah, that's just about what Florida is good for... just please don't
litter in the process, and take the bodies with you when you leave. ____________________
The OBOLISK is Divine.
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Geist
Member Posts: 127 Registered: 5/11/2002 Status: Offline
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posted on 4/2/2003 at 06:02 PM |
I guess me and CGB will take the bodies with us on a canoe ride through the
everglades...
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Closetgothbabe
Member Posts: 189 Registered: 31/12/1969 Status: Offline
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posted on 4/2/2003 at 06:52 PM |
Nah we can take the bodies down the road to where the rednecks live and
they have hogs. Then we can unload the bodies and the hogs will eat the
bones and all...hehe no evidence!! woohoo!!
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Domkitten
Fanatic  Posts: 470 Registered: 23/9/2002 Status: Offline
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posted on 4/2/2003 at 08:55 PM |
Oddly enough, I'm thinking on doing something similiair when I return to
the states in a few months. I've got a month long vaction, will have far to
much money on my hands, and friends strewn across the contenant. I say just
buy a cheap car and go where the wind will carry you. Why have an inteneray
for these sort of things. And, hell, why not bring the drugs for just in
case, heh.
____________________
It's like kegel exercises for your throat.~Monolycus
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Sticupus
Fanatic Posts: 254 Registered: 31/12/1969 Status: Offline
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posted on 4/2/2003 at 09:15 PM |
Actually the alligators will be a problem if you take them into the canoe.
It's that chum factor that will fuck you in the end from that action.
I agree; give them to the hogs. Remember to shave the heads and remove the
teeth from the bodies. Those pesky things won't get digested, and you may
have to sift through the pig shit looking for it. Not fun at all.
-Oh my I've said too much.... ____________________
The OBOLISK is Divine.
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Geist
Member Posts: 127 Registered: 5/11/2002 Status: Offline
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posted on 4/2/2003 at 09:17 PM |
Alright Dom, whan ya get back ? I got an old 70's big cargo van with the
awesom shag carpet interior... i say we put on our cowboy hats, grab our
flyswatters, a couple of good lookin girls, and pack a suitcase full of
assorted chemical coctails and show the road what its all about... in fact.
I say we make this a shmeng road-trip... we're gonna need everyones
addresses and we'll just head across the us picking up a different
shmengling at every stop. As far as having an itinerary I see no problem
with that. It will be more of places to, not when to get there. Who cares
if the shortest distance from point A to point B is a straight line. I'm
thinkin of going from seattle to cali via new york.
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bettie_x
Extreme Fanatic Posts: 1570 Registered: 31/12/1969 Status: Offline
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posted on 6/2/2003 at 02:36 AM |
" I wanna drive a school bus
a school bus on lsd
and drive to the brady's
and pick up alice
and then we'll bake some brownieeeess
"
~houses of the holy- the rugburns ____________________
Trapped in time. Surrounded by evil. Low on gas.
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Dolorosa
Extreme Fanatic  Posts: 856 Registered: 31/12/1969 Status: Offline
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posted on 6/2/2003 at 09:24 AM |
| If I can remember who I am when you pass through, I'll have to take you out
into the Anzo Borrego desert for a vision quest or somethin'...man, once
the Peyote kicks in and Coyote starts talking to you, thats some Fear and
Loathing stuff right there. Valley of the Moon is a great place to go rock
hopping and you can't beat San Diego for hidden shmengy places. Give me
word when you pass through southern Cali. ____________________
In the valley of the Goats, the Goat Fucker is King
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