|
|
Currently no members online:)
You are an anonymous user. You can register for free by clicking here |
We have 10 guests online !
|
|
|
|
|
Mistress Manners: Rules the last part |
Posted by
callei on Wednesday, December 15, 2004 - 09:56 AM PST
And here we go!
75. Never date anyone whose name begins with "Lord" or "Lady" unless they are British and can prove it.
76. Never date anyone whose rules don't apply to them
77. Never date anyone whose sexuality changes more than twice on the first date
78. Never date anyone whose smile never reaches their eyes
79. Never date anyone with more shoes than underwear
80. Never date anyone with more than 5 online identities
81. Never date anyone with whom you work
82. Never date anyone without a favorite number.
83. Never date married people when children are involved. Regardless of whether they want it or not, you will always be the lowest priority. Have sex with them if you want, just don’t try to “date” them.
84. Never date someone that alphabetizes his or her canned goods.
85. Never date someone that doesn’t already have a hobby in common with you
86. Never date someone that doesn’t know how to put on their own condom/dental dam/other barrier method
87. Never date someone that doesn’t know what their sign is and gets mad if you tell them
88. Never date someone that says, “You read this shit?”
89. Never date someone that thinks trust games are things that get stock brokers put in jail
90. Never date someone that wont share their popcorn with you in the movie theatre
91. Never date someone that wont sit on a bench in a public park and admire the scenery with you
92. Never date someone that wont skip in public with you
93. Never date someone that wont splash around in the tub
94. Never date someone that wont watch a Disney movie with you
95. Never date someone who categorically refuses to share his or her dessert.
96. Never date someone who thinks getting back to their roots means cow tipping
97. Never date someone who thinks you have bad taste
98. Never date someone with more issues than your mother
99. Never date the bouncer, no matter what kind of “free ins” they claim they can get you
100. Never trust a girl with no fags - never trust a fag with no girls -
never trust a dyke with no boys - and never trust a boy with no dykes
|
|
| |
|
|
Average Rating : 5.0
Total ratings : 2
|
|
|
|
|
|
Rules the last part | Login/Create an account | 12 Comments |
| Comments are owned by the poster. We aren't responsible for their content. |
Re: Rules the last part
by Kira (mod_complex-at-hotmail.com)
on Dec 15, 2004 - 07:10 PM
(User info | Send a Message)
|
"100. Never trust a girl with no fags - never trust a fag with no girls - never trust a dyke with no boys - and never trust a boy with no dykes."
This is my favorite, hands down. Can we get this printed on matchbooks or something?
|
Re: Rules the last part by Devin (devin-at-vibechild-dot-com) on Dec 15, 2004 - 08:50 PM (User info | Send a Message) http://devin.vibechild.com/ | It's been in the Shmeng random quotes box for quite a while now. I've been living by that rule for years and it's been working for me. |
[ No anonymous comments ]
Re: Rules the last part
by Meranda_Jade (Meranda@mymind.com)
on Dec 16, 2004 - 07:49 PM
(User info | Send a Message)
|
101.) never date anyone who has 100 requirements for dating.
(this is not a statement meant to be inflammatory, it just struck me as funny.)
|
Never Say Never
by Monolycus on Dec 17, 2004 - 07:05 AM
(User info | Send a Message)
|
Now I remember why I don't date anymore... I was out of the pool of candidates after #41.
~M.
|
[ No anonymous comments ]
[ No anonymous comments ]
I think everybody has a crazy ex or two... by Xaoswolf (xaoswolfathotmaildotcom) on Dec 25, 2004 - 01:25 PM (User info | Send a Message) http://Xaoswolf.tripod.com | Well, you can always say, "at least they didn't kill me..." or "thanks to her, I how to spot light reflecting off a rifle scope from across the yard" |
[ No anonymous comments ]
Re: Rules the last part
by gothicmorman (litty_klj@hotmail.com)
on Dec 20, 2004 - 12:04 PM
(User info | Send a Message)
http://
|
Never date someone who takes dating rules seriously : P... and if they don't know what RHPS is, don't date them educate them : D...
the ruthless
|
Re: Fuck the Rules
by Domkitten (saradevil@saradevil.com)
on Dec 22, 2004 - 02:59 AM
(User info | Send a Message)
http://www.saradevil.com
|
Why isn't there a rule in here about not dating anyone who is so freaking judgmental. I mean come on...what's wrong with being too drunk it with to much ammo, it works for Dolo, not to mention Bettie.
and changing sexes/sexuality more then once before the date is over....have you met Mono?
Never date anyone who thinks their perfect? Um...I can think of at least on person here who thinks that much of their dark and dreary self...
I'm pretty sure I could meet CGB in a club at 1 am and I think that would rock...
I’m pretty sure there was a time when even our dear little MRD could not name three different kinds of sex, not to mention thinking that society was right, and I’d bet good money that with some time, and care, she turned into a wonderful date.
And since when was it bad to think of flirting as foreplay…when done well it’s a wonderful first step…
What’s wrong with being ugly when you laugh, I’m almost positive that even Feral would look more Feral when he was cracking a rib….
What’s wrong with not telling a “real name” what so important about a “real name” are you talking birth certificate or something else here? For many people a real name goes beyond the label slapped on us by some bureaucratic piece of paper, unless of course you’ve changed your name to make it “real”.
I’d try to go on, but it would be silly. I think that part of this was a wonderful exercise, but part of it is just damn silly. I mean even Devin has been known to say “So sayeth me” on occasion, but should that be grounds from excluding him from the dating pool?
We all have our moments, but that doesn’t mean that we should all be eliminated from the list of potential suitors. Couldn’t this just be boiled down to one sweet and simple rule…
Never date anyone who is a project?
|
Re: Fuck the Rules by Schizo (Aranea@Spidersdance.com) on Dec 22, 2004 - 03:22 PM (User info | Send a Message) http:// | How about just, don't date anyone if you don't really enjoy dating them. Fuck what other people think - your parents, your friends, even the people on Shmeng. If you really want to date them, then date them, and if it turns out screwy, well, you learned something. |
[ No anonymous comments ]
Re: Rules the last part
by Meranda_Jade (Meranda@mymind.com)
on Dec 22, 2004 - 02:10 PM
(User info | Send a Message)
|
98. Never date someone with more issues than your mother
Okay, this one's easy. NOBODY has more issues than my mother. Except maybe my sister, and I don't intend to date her.
|
Re: Rules the last part
by Zero (-)
on Mar 29, 2005 - 05:31 PM
(User info | Send a Message)
|
i love these things...i remember a girl that made a list of things her perfect guy would have to have and i laughed my ass off as she read it.
101. never date anyone that uses words like "pro-active" or phrases like "think outside the box"
102. Never date someone who doesn't know the value of a good joke.
and for some of you who probably need/want this added......
103. never date someone that never wants to be on top.
|
|
|