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| Articles: Fatal Attraction:How do you Break the ties that bind?? |
Posted by
Rae on Saturday, June 16, 2001 - 03:02 AM PST
I met Jennifer almost a year ago, she felt lonely, needed a friend, and I, being the huge empath that I am, befriended her. Everything went well with our friendship at first, we would sit and make each other laugh until we cried and have some of the most deep heart felt discussions that normally you wouldn't share with someone else. It was refreshing to have someone to share my deepest inner emotions with, I trusted her completely.
Then, a long lost friend relocated to where I am, and he moved in with me to split the costs. It was right after this transition that Jennifer started acting strangely. She started becoming more and more demanding of my time, and laying guilt trips on me when I could not spend as much time with her. So I tried to appease her by letting her come over as much as she wanted even if I was busy.
Well. after awhile that started to become old. I was finding myself feeling overwhelmed, I went from being all alone for two years straight, to having a room mate, taking in my 12 year old niece, and a demanding friend, with no time left for myself. Quite a change, and it was having a negative drain on my life.
I started becomming snappish with everyone, and felt as though I could rip them into pieces. I knew this was wrong and that I really needed to do something about it. Jennifer was at the top of my problem list, so I told myself I would start backing away, and try to regain some direction with alone time.
The phone would ring and I just let the answering machine pick up, I knew it was her. She would call and leave message after message with just a few moments in between. Finally I would answer it around the 15th call and ask her what she wanted that I was kind of busy, "Oh, what are you doing? fucking Drac? (my room mate) she asked in a semi-hostile voice. I was sort of blown away that she would ask something like that. "Actually no, Jennifer, I was working on my website", I replied back in the same manner of tone as she had did with me. "Oh, you and that damn computer, you really need to get a life." That was it! I could no longer hold my tongue! I told her that she was indeed the one who needed to get a life, flaming conversation went back and forth, and I finally ended it by hanging up. *ring, ring ring* the phone went till up to 6:00 a.m. with no sleep, I had to get ready for work.
When I came home, dead tired, there she was, sitting on my porch waiting for me. "Arghh! I am too tired to do this again today" I told myself as I got out of the car. I dragged my body to the front porch and she told me we needed to talk, she apologized over and over as the tears rolled down her face, and me, being too tired to really argue, accepted her apology so I could get into bed at some point.
Well, she seemed to back off a bit for a few days, then it started all over again, getting worse and worse each time. If I wouldn't answer the phone she would just come over and bang on the door. You could here her saying "Aw C'mon, open the door, I know your home, I see your car in the garage. My room mate wanted to open the door and tell her off, but I told him that was sort of mean and that I didn't have the heart to. We then began to debate, he told me that as long as I pittied her, she was going to continously be a thorn in my side, and that her behaviour was just plain crazy and unjustifiable by any means. I then in return told him how cruel and heartless he was.
Needless to say, he was right. So, I finally got to the point where I told her that I felt it best to end the friendship, that I just couldn't give her the time she was demanding from me, nor did I want to at this point. Yes, there was tears and guilt trips trying to be played out, but I fought the urge to say I am sorry, lets resume our friendship. I went into my house and closed the door, I felt bad, but at the same time, I felt so relieved, like someone pulled an anvil off my shoulders.
That pretty much ended it? afraid not. She stalks my house, and uses her 12 year old daughter to try to gain entrance into my life by making my niece befriend her. Sadly, my niece is going through the same Psychodrama with her daughter as I was with Jennifer. The apple certainly didn't fall to far from the tree. If me and Drac go shopping, there is Jennifer, if we go out to eat..there is Jennifer, if we go to the theater, there is Jennifer! and it's always Hi guys! how you doing? wow! isn't it strange how we alway are at the same place at the same time? maybe it is fate that we are together. (?!!) It has nothing to do with fate, more like fatal attraction!
I can't believe that after all was said and done, she still persists, sometimes I felt as though I should just give in. She has me worn down and has had me in tears of my own. My life is not mine, it is everyone else's. Control...what is that? I have none. I have talked to police authorities and even an attorney, and guess what? They told me that they could do nothing as long as she has not threatened me in any manner. So what do you do to break the ties that bind? I am at a total loss. I just want to be free of her, completely.
I thought I would post this to all of you so you could learn from my mistakes. Many people think "fatal attraction" only happens with intimate relationships we persue, not so, it can happen with a mere friend, trust me, I am living proof of it. Some of you may have already had this happen, if so, you can feel comforted that you are not alone. A word from the wise.. beware of those "I am falling apart and I need your friendship more than anything" types. Don't think that you can fix them, they are beyond repair. Run, and run fast!
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Average Rating : 4.5
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| Fatal Attraction:How do you Break the ties that bind?? | Login/Create an account | 15 Comments |
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Re: Fatal Attraction:How do you Break the ties that bind??
by callei (psanguis@yahoo.com)
on Jun 16, 2001 - 06:31 AM
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http://www.plynlymon.com
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DOOOOOD! that is awful! Ok i have had no sleep so this suggestion maybe a bad idea. that said maybe you should treaten her, call her ever ten minutes to bitch about make believe stuff that she cant turn back on you. harass her for a change.
better Idea is to change your phone number and laugh at her every time she calls. pick up the phone and say things like " ah well i knew today was going to well. Dont call me again" and hang up.
point and laugh at her in the mall when she shows up. shun and ridicule might work at bit.
the BESt idea is to call her in as an abusive parent. Social services HAS to investigate all calls. keep calling them and saying that your neice told you that her daughter said ....
Give her something real to bitch about.
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Freeky psycho peeples
by VampCourt (Morbidchic@hotmail.com)
on Jun 16, 2001 - 04:58 PM
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Rae.. darling.. taunt her to get her violent and then throw a restaining on the crazy bitch.
If not.. Just kick her ass all over the place till she wishes she didnt want to be friends with you all that bad..
*smiles* Im wicked sorry to hear about that..
Jesus.. if its not one thing.. its another huh? You were a lady of compleate intrigue in your past life... :P
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Re: Fatal Attraction:How do you Break the ties that bind??
by Schizo on Jun 18, 2001 - 09:56 AM
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Oh my God. Yowch. That is psycho. I'd say be cautious, follow legal routes to deal with her. If the police don't do anything, then if it gets too bad, I suppose you can move. But don't get drawn into doing anything you will end up regretting. She may be trying to irritate you to that extent to get you back for "letting her down". Don't give her the satisfaction.
And I thought my boyfriend's ex was psycho!
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Re: Fatal Attraction:How do you Break the ties that bind??
by NightAngel_of_Darkness on Jul 04, 2001 - 07:48 PM
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This sounds directly exacly like my brothers ex girlfriend...
He has just recently moved and is more then likly going to have to put a restraining order on her...
This girl you speek of does the same stuff my bros ex does...
Its sad... She turns around and bytches about everything about us and then trys to befriend us once more. Crying and saying shes pregers when shes not, when she cant...
*sighs*
Its sad indeed but you did the right thing...
What shes doing is stalking... Its not right...
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